Top Ten (Humorous) Reasons to Not Get Divorced

Countering the After Christmas Divorces

Well, there are reports here and there that the divorce rate tends to go up around Christmas, and in the weeks following, especially centering around the first work day following the start of the New Year.  Maybe because that’s when the attorneys return to work, but also because of things like the stress that comes over the holidays and extra time with your spouse if your marriage is troubled.  It is a sad trend. 

There are lots of reasons not to get divorced……lots…..and anybody reading this blog very much realizes some of them simply by observing the hassles that come with divorce.  But I thought I would come up with some other reasons NOT to get divorced…..some in a humorous vein.  Who know, maybe somebody will latch on to one and cancel their divorce!  That’s be fine with me.  So here they are….hope you get a chuckle in it somewhere. 

Top ten humorous reasons to NOT get divorced

          (please note, entirely tongue in cheek……sometimes you just have to

          find something to laugh at in all the divorce garbage!)

THE TROUBLE WITH DIVORCE:

1)    If you do, you’d have to make your own birthday cake!  And learn how to sing, “Happy Birthday” WHILE blowing out your own candles!

2)   Odds are, your attorney’s kids can afford college without your help!

   3)  You might lose your favorite cat in the divorce.

   4)  If you don’t do the dishes, nobody else will do them no matter HOW

 LONG you wait.

    5) There may be lots of other available men/women out there, but time

 has passed, and you may not be the great catch you once were!

    6) When you’re sick, you’ll have to make your own chicken soup.

    7) When your check bounces, guess who has to take the blame for not

          balancing the checkbook!

    8) You think you and your spouse fight too much NOW…..!

    9) Too many of your sentences will go unfinished without your spouse

          around to complete them for you.

    10) You’ll have to snuggle with your dog to get warm at night.

Besides, do you REALLY want to have to start dating all over again at YOUR age?

Seriously, though, I’ll tell you what.  If there is any way you can save your marriage and avoid divorce, find a reason to make it work and then MAKE IT WORK!  Really work, that is, not continue in an artificial farce…..because divorce is NOT all it’s cracked up to be…..trust me on that!