tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24841800238465740542024-03-06T02:10:17.974-06:00Finding God in the Seasons of DivorceAimed at providing encouragement for individuals, especially Christians, going through the tragic experience of divorce. Some readers are the ones who are actually divorcing and so the intent is to help them find hope through the postings in the blog and access to the Finding God in the Seasons of Divorce book.Finding God Devotionalshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07550940803936603735noreply@blogger.comBlogger421125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2484180023846574054.post-60279387369162605362019-09-15T20:35:00.000-05:002019-09-15T20:35:14.744-05:00Friends, Anyone?<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"> <b><i>WHATEVER HAPPENED TO FRIENDS?</i></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><b><i><br /></i></b></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4q6UiJ45eYL-ml6PVWJJSp8KsqdVTO1Qed3CmVzLux46RUPKZGxjM-kpdt13DIbs7bm8quj1qgCRMPAZwyZx2EBcbxlktmPKLaenOXMKUwDdSIIGX2M4MLwzVnawN_mKWOFLL8EsrOYel/s1600/bestfriend.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1047" data-original-width="1600" height="261" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4q6UiJ45eYL-ml6PVWJJSp8KsqdVTO1Qed3CmVzLux46RUPKZGxjM-kpdt13DIbs7bm8quj1qgCRMPAZwyZx2EBcbxlktmPKLaenOXMKUwDdSIIGX2M4MLwzVnawN_mKWOFLL8EsrOYel/s400/bestfriend.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I tell you what….dealing with the long term post-flood recovery and impact while juggling all the normal activities has just kept the schedule crazy! Hence it’s been too long since the last blog…my apologies. On the other hand, as of today another local resident’s home is now winterized with fresh repairs by a visiting ABMen flood relief team. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Nevertheless, on to the blog….<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Recently I had an email conversation with a friend who is dealing with a lot of different kinds of life changes, some of which are amazingly difficult…and is making those changes with patience, courage and perseverance. In the course of the conversation, we discussed how sometimes in life we find friends who seem to really care about us, but then something will come along that makes plain that their commitment to the friendship isn’t at all what it appeared to be, but was very superficial at best. In those moments, we are able to distinguish between people who appear to be our friends, and those who truly are the kind of loyal friends who will stand with you throughout all of life’s vicissitudes. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Often, in a divorce, the couple and their friends go through some very difficult times of sorting. Sometimes the friends will choose one partner or the other to keep as a friend. Sometimes they will find ways to make space for each partner. Sometimes they will avoid the whole issue and just walk away from the friendship. But sometimes it goes the other way. Sometimes it is the person going through divorce who abandons friends as they walk away from both spouse and other relationships. And yet…friends are so important, critical supports we need in these times of extreme stress. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I read in and old edition of Guideposts the other day the following story of Norman Vincent Peale’s, and thought it worth sharing. The story begins as he tells about a time when, as a young man, he met Henry Ford by chance, and asked him for advice about success in life. Ford’s answer is:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">“Who’s your best friend? I’ll tell you who it is: It’s the person who brings out the best in you. Always associate with the best people—that is where you will find such a person.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In the Guidepost article, Peale reflects on the encounter and says,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">“And there is an opposite side to Henry Ford’s question, too. It’s ‘Whose best friend are <i>you?</i>’ Try asking yourself that question from time to time. Then when you answer it, make sure that you deserve that title by bringing out the best in that person every day, in every way.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The old saying is, “the best way to find a friend is to be a friend.” I like both Ford and Peale’s advice. And for those who find themselves in a time of life in which life events are resulting in shifting friendships, I would add a few comments of my own.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">First, be very careful about discarding friends. Sometimes it may appear that someone doesn’t care, when in fact they don’t know exactly what to say or do, or they may be otherwise preoccupied and not realize they are letting you down. Good friends in life are rare and precious treasures, do not discard friendships lightly. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Secondly, when you find those friends who are the kind of friends Ford is talking about, friends who are loyal and supportive, friends whose influence makes you rise to the best of who you are, and friends who walk with you through even the darkest of days, when you find friends like that, treat them like the treasures they are and never let them go. Friends like that only come our way now and then in life, and as a result, are worth hanging onto. And the best way to hang on to those friends, is to be that kind of friend for them when <i>they</i>are dealing with the rough times in their lives.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Thirdly, never forget, no matter what happens with the other friends in your life, Jesus calls his followers his friends, too, and his promise is to never fail us or forsake us! He’s the best friend you will ever know…he knows you better than anyone else, he cares for you more than anyone else ever has, and his help, advice and counsel are perfect. </span> When you feel like your other friends have let you down or abandoned you, know that your best friend, Christ Jesus, never will.</span><span style="font-family: Comic Sans MS; font-size: 12pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
</div>
Finding God Devotionalshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07550940803936603735noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2484180023846574054.post-70196723791431903542019-08-11T18:47:00.001-05:002019-08-11T18:47:23.726-05:00Just Do One Thing<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"> <b><i>DEALING ONE DAY AT A TIME</i></b></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfQ3pbNpYXa4nAYhX3D-eXWoVdwsDQg_8xGqutgn-kQG18TDodEKHe6pwMy48EgGrR3HxWxDrt_dvcjaiq2gfAfhs5kCdQeTvx66HXRR1USr0-mBBeSHhMr2bbaFG4TYuAInyMR4qkHD5s/s1600/one+thing.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1237" data-original-width="1600" height="247" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfQ3pbNpYXa4nAYhX3D-eXWoVdwsDQg_8xGqutgn-kQG18TDodEKHe6pwMy48EgGrR3HxWxDrt_dvcjaiq2gfAfhs5kCdQeTvx66HXRR1USr0-mBBeSHhMr2bbaFG4TYuAInyMR4qkHD5s/s320/one+thing.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Do you ever have days when you wake up and feel so overwhelmed that you would want to go back to bed because you just can’t, there is just too much on your plate, too much to do, and you just don’t have the energy or the brain power to tackle it all? </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Maybe those days come because you have been traumatized. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Maybe they come because you have become so discouraged that you are barely hanging on and feel depressed most of the time. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Maybe you have those days when everything seems to all come at once and neither your plate nor your calendar have enough room for it all. Or, if you have recently gone through a divorce, you may feel that way because of the overwhelming loneliness that has come to your home. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Whatever the reason, that experience can become debilitating. What do you do?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">How do you manage when you feel life has become unmanageable? Of course it may involve prayer, it may involve counseling, it may involve the support of good friends, but in addition to all of those, there is a simple truth that can help. When things get to be too much, when there is more than you can possibly do in one day, when the plate is so full that you can’t even lift it, then it is time to adjust your focus. Hone down your perspective so that your attention is not consumed with everything, but instead is consumed with ONE thing. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Find ONE thing among all the things, that you can do first. One thing for today. One thing for this hour. One thing to begin with. Forget about trying to do everything, and do one thing. Let that become one step. And do that ONE step. No matter how long it takes, no matter how much energy it consumes, no matter how many other things you leave behind to do it, do that one thing. You will then be able to scratch one thing off your list. Afterwards, you can consider what might be the next thing, but that is only afterwards. Right now, do the one thing. And measure success by doing ONE thing, not by whether or not you do EVERYTHING.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">One thing is progress. One thing is something. One thing is one less thing that awaits you. One thing is an accomplishment. One thing is one thing you can take off the plate, because it is done. One thing means that you ARE not doing nothing.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Oh, sure, there may be other things thrown onto your plate while you are doing that one thing, and the schedule may become more full even as you make progress on the one thing. But when you feel like you can’t do ANYTHING, that ONE THING proves otherwise. And when you are talking about doing everything you can, some days, one thing may literally be ALL that you CAN! Give yourself credit, then, for the one thing you have done.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Once you have managed to accomplish one thing a time or two, you might decide to take a day to tackle TWO things that day. Or, it may be that the one thing you select gets done in less time than you thought, at which point you might decide you want to do one more thing unexpectedly. Eventually, you will get back to being your own self. In the meantime, give yourself some grace, and focus on what you CAN do, not on what you CAN’T. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">All of this reminds me of a passage in Isaiah that often comes back and gives me hope in dark days. Isaiah 61, quoted by Jesus as referring to himself, describes the difference God wants to make in our lives, the changes he wants to bring about. In verse three, a couple of changes described are these:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> “<span class="text"><b><span style="background-color: white;">the oil of gladness instead of mourning,</span></b></span><b><br /></b><span class="indent-1-breaks"><b><span style="background-color: white;"> </span></b></span><span class="text"><b><span style="background-color: white;">the mantle of praise instead of a faint spirit;</span></b></span><span class="indent-1-breaks"><b>” (RSV)</b></span><b><o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">There is a replacement for the heaviness of heart of our lives. God wants to replace the gray skies of mourning and fainthearted weakness into gladness and praise. But often that replacement occurs only one step at a time. As you step ahead, take time to give God thanks for who he is, for his help in each thing, and to celebrate the fact that one thing has been done. As time goes by, God will restore your soul and you will discover the gladness and praise that you seek. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">But for now, just do one thing. </span> And then, let that one thing count!</span><span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: small;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
</div>
Finding God Devotionalshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07550940803936603735noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2484180023846574054.post-15177662478223670742019-07-28T18:59:00.000-05:002019-07-28T18:59:10.797-05:00Struggle and Progress<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">TIME HEALS ALL WOUNDS…</span></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">BUT HOW MUCH TIME?</span><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></i></b></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsjpGZFFcbGzaxC2-0LzI9ErEt291faV33Cqd5a2GfTgZKDmO9IQO_fHMoC2-uO4baC5rIbq7uatCOx0oUfHm06nEKQPteB7v5SRgADEbBsDz9bG8nPabwBrReFQTb2ILe8NoGr5AlDyQa/s1600/quotes-about-progress-and-struggle.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="654" data-original-width="720" height="290" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsjpGZFFcbGzaxC2-0LzI9ErEt291faV33Cqd5a2GfTgZKDmO9IQO_fHMoC2-uO4baC5rIbq7uatCOx0oUfHm06nEKQPteB7v5SRgADEbBsDz9bG8nPabwBrReFQTb2ILe8NoGr5AlDyQa/s320/quotes-about-progress-and-struggle.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">At my church, this year we are celebrating our 150<sup>th</sup>year of ministry. It is kind of fun, going back and reading all the old stories and looking at a lot of old pictures of those who went before. People share some of their stories and find the photos often spark memories from days gone by. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">As part of the celebration, we are moving through history decade by decade with reminders of world and church events of the particular decade. Today, the focus decade was the 1990’s. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">As I read over the list of events, I found striking the number of terrible things that occurred in that decade, the Rodney King trial and riots, World Trade Center bombing, Hurricane Andrew, Oklahoma City bombing, the bombing of the Olympics in Georgia, and the shooting at Columbine. What a decade of tragedies! And even as the words were coming out of my mouth, I thought of another tragic event of the 90’s, my own divorce in 1998. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Now don’t get me wrong. Life has moved on for me, and I have spent the last 15 years in a good marriage with a great wife, and I can look back and see how difficult it would have been for that first marriage to continue, let alone become a good and healthy relationship. There remains some tidbits of fallout here and there, some of which still bring sorrow or difficulty, but by and large, life has moved on. Still, 21 years out of divorce..that seems like such a really long time! It’s amazing to think that there would be ANY fallout still around. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">My church has also been involved in helping with local flood relief, even after four months. Many parts of our city have moved on, living their daily lives with little or no impact from the flooded rivers that impacted the area back in March. But this week we had a group of hard workers come from Kansas, North Dakota and Minnesota who worked hard to help some of the folks who haven’t yet been able to move on, because their homes are far from back to normal. We met people struggling to move on, struggling to get back to where they were, struggling to feel safe once again, struggling to feel that someday things are going to be okay. They have been waiting and waiting for something to happen, for authorization to make repairs, for enough money to purchase materials, waiting to get through all the hoops and waiting periods required to apply for FEMA help, and then to appeal when they are denied, and then to apply for SBA loans when they still are denied. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">They are tired, they are sad, they are discouraged. Some of them wonder if things will ever get back to normal, if life will ever move past the disaster for them.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It seems to me, there are some significant parallels in these experiences. Divorce, floods and other life change moments can hit us hard and leave us devastated and numb. Forward progress can feel very slow, and the hurt and discouragement can run deep. But, over time, a new normal comes into existence. It’s just that, it takes time, hard work, patience and perseverance. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In the midst of the tediously slow progress, sometimes one is well advised to recognize and celebrate the little steps of progress that are made, even while facing a mountain of work ahead. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">A counselor friend of mine offered an insightful statement. She said, “a little progress is still progress.” Sometimes we want things to get back to normal NOW, to accomplish everything NOW, for the hardship to end NOW. But often, that simply isn’t very realistic. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Sometimes, all we can accomplish NOW, is “a little progress.”</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And a little progress sometimes can count in a very big way.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The work the visiting group did for flood victims wasn’t a lot, there are hundreds of homes still needing assistance.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But they DID make “a little progress” by making a difference for a few homes.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And that little bit of progress meant everything to the people who were helped.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Maybe time doesn’t really ever heal ALL wounds. And maybe it takes more than just time to make some progress. But no matter how daunting the path ahead, it is always wise to recognize even a little progress when it is achieved, because life is lived only one day, one moment, one step at a time, remembering that in the end, the journey becomes a long, marvelous trip.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
</div>
Finding God Devotionalshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07550940803936603735noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2484180023846574054.post-8521987807374084642019-07-07T17:57:00.004-05:002019-07-07T17:57:40.662-05:00BUMPER STICKERS OF SIGNIFICANCE<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<b><i><span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 16.0pt;">SINGLE
DADS MATTER<o:p></o:p></span></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12.0pt;">I was
driving the other day and saw a bumper sticker on the car in front of me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It said, “Single dad’s lives matter.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Of course, it is a spinoff from the “Black
Lives Matter” slogan, also imitated in the slogan, “Blue Lives Matter.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In every case, the motto is an expression of
frustration and a cry for recognition of a problem, a desire for significance.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I understand the frustration of the single
dads bumper sticker, though there are lots of frustrations all the way around
in the world of divorce.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I thought the
topic worth consideration in a blog.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12.0pt;">I once knew
a man frustrated by the court as he sought custody of his young child, who was
living with his mother who had a live-in lover at the time, and the lover was a
known drug dealer, <i>and yet</i> the court refused to give the dad
custody.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As near as I could tell, the
dad was a responsible sort of guy, had a decent home, a decent job, worked
hard, attended church, spent time with his kid when he could.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Why did he not get custody.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The man told me that it was because the judge
in the county of jurisdiction was biased toward women, and always gave full
custody of the children to the mother.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
thought it odd that a judge could actually be that way, until I ran into
another couple going through divorce from a neighboring county.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The wife had filed for divorce in the other
county not her own, because she knew that the judge in that county always
favored giving the mother custody.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>These
two contacts I had were years apart, miles apart and independently verified
that the bias did exist….justice isn’t always quite as blind as the famous
statue would suggest.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Since that time, I
have seen a lot of times where such bias exists.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was even struck that a popular Christian
divorce recovery program’s materials were written in such a way that they
clearly assumed the mother had custody of the children and that it was the
dad’s job to be paying child support.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>No
wonder the car had a bumper sticker demanding that single dads matter!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12.0pt;">The battle
of the sexes often comes to the foreground in divorce.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have known of a number of husbands who
falsified finances in various ways to keep from having to give money equitably
to their divorcing wives.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But then, I
have also known women who have done the same thing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I suspect that the bumper sticker not only
originates from custody experiences, but also from all the discussion in the
media about single moms and their struggle.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I want to point out that there is often a disparity between single moms
and single dads, because our society still has disparity in pay between men and
women in a number of fields, so a single mom often has a harder time earning
the same salary that the single dad makes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>But not always, of course.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There
are a lot of single dads out there struggling to make ends meet, and feeling especially
a pinch on the wallet when running a household and paying child support, and
sometimes maintenance (or alimony).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It
is such a tangled web.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12.0pt;">I have also known
of parents who use the children as a weapon or as spies against an ex by
undermining visitation agreements, or by manipulating children to woo them away
from the custodial parent, or by denying access that, though legally granted,
is sometimes hard to enforce.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Out there
are many dads whose children are living with the ex-wife who are trying to be a
good father when only seeing their children every other weekend and a few hours
during the week.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I think that the core
of the bumper sticker slogan is that dads DO make a difference in their
children’s lives, and for them to be marginalized or excluded from the lives of
their children, or for their participation to be undervalued by court or
society is doing a great disservice to the children of divorce.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Children do best when they have a healthy
relationship with both parents all together in a unified home.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When a divorce occurs, the children’s best
chance to grow healthy continues to require the involvement of BOTH parents.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Using access to children as a way to inflict
pain on one’s ex is a cruel and reckless action that occurs far too often.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sometimes, single parents who are suffering
from that kind of abuse, can use an encouraging word from those of us who are
their friends and family.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Probably the
guy with that bumper sticker needed to hear someone tell him that he IS important
to his kids, and that his efforts to be a good dad DO matter.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Divorce is hard enough.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Turning it into a war zone leaves devastation
wherever it happens.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br /></div>
Finding God Devotionalshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07550940803936603735noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2484180023846574054.post-18937743257642507082019-07-01T19:53:00.002-05:002019-07-01T19:53:34.632-05:00REDEFINING TRUST! A blog about new understandings in trusting God.<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<b><i><span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 16.0pt;">DO YOU
TRUST ME?<o:p></o:p></span></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12.0pt;">Would you
mind if I shared some recent learnings on a personal level? So I had surgery on my rotator cuff, and am
now assigned to use that arm for NOTHING for a while, keeping it in a
sling. At the same time, I began
physical therapy, but a really odd one.
It is a physical therapy in which my task is: DO NOTHING!
I lie down, and the therapist takes my arm, and I am supposed to do
absolutely nothing with it while he manipulates up and down and in and out and
around and around. Every once in a while
(or maybe more), it hurts, I wince, and he pauses. And then he says: “It hurts because YOU are trying to help
me. You are NOT supposed to be using
your muscles, you need to relax them, let them go limp, and let me do the work. You have to trust me.” So I relax, and trust him….until it goes way
out and I wince again, and he repeats the mantra! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12.0pt;">Shortly
after my first bout of this, I visited with a friend who had the same surgery
some time ago, and she shared with me how she had learned during her therapy
that, over time, the shoulder pain had caused her to kind of scrunch her
shoulders to avoid the pain, which resulting in tensing up the muscles. In the therapy then, it became a major task
to retrain the brain to relax instead.
When she said that after I had seen the physical therapist, the
combination of the two clicked for me.
All of a sudden, I noticed how often I was tensing my shoulder and neck
muscles on a daily basis, instead of just letting the arm relax and be held by
the sling. So I have started really
trying to pay attention, and it has taken an incredible amount of concentration
to tell my arm and shoulder to relax!
It’s crazy!!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12.0pt;">When I went
in for my second session, I had made significant strides in being able to relax
and trust his movements with my arm. But
there were times I still winced. Times
he had to stop. Times he had to remind
me: “Breathe. Relax.
Trust me.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12.0pt;">I think God
is probably telling me the same thing.
And maybe he wants to tell you the same thing, too. There are so many things that demand so much
attention, so many questions I have about relationships and the future and
understanding God’s will for me in THIS moment and what plans need to be made
and all the things I need to get done and what things need to be let go of
and…, and…, and…, and…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12.0pt;">It’s a lot
like that song by Johnny Diaz, “Just Breathe,” which you can hear on YouTube if
you don’t know it. Sometimes I think the
most important thing we can hear from God…or at least that I need to hear from
God…is the same thing my physical therapist is saying: Relax.
Breathe. Trust me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12.0pt;">What are the
hard things you are facing right now?
What are the uncertainties that are nagging at you? What are the questions you stress over? What are the fears that have you in
knots? What are the problems bigger than
you can solve? What are the ways you
feel that everything is spinning out of control? Is God trying to get you to realize you just
need to trust Him? That you need to
relax, trust him and just breathe? That
you need to realize that he does know what he is doing, and he has not left the
throne, and you are the apple of his eye (Psalm 17:8)?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 106%; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;">Relax.
Breath. Trust. I will give it a whirl again tomorrow
morning. How about you?</span></div>
Finding God Devotionalshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07550940803936603735noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2484180023846574054.post-15108037131330771142019-05-24T20:29:00.000-05:002019-05-24T20:29:21.630-05:00Through the Waters<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">ALONE AND STARTING OVER</span></i></b></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEihl9IMaiuKEDP1gVCIsvRAUfo4Gy2r7IYX3Noo6__4VQnaclCyzWFRfncem1G2aNwrMbvp81ugudyoKuUJj3T2aFtmvNLwAfh_lThyphenhyphen4vpPmx4ioc_kpJRsC2OgdivBYo_Mmz8dtjSR-InB/s1600/isaiah.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1482" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEihl9IMaiuKEDP1gVCIsvRAUfo4Gy2r7IYX3Noo6__4VQnaclCyzWFRfncem1G2aNwrMbvp81ugudyoKuUJj3T2aFtmvNLwAfh_lThyphenhyphen4vpPmx4ioc_kpJRsC2OgdivBYo_Mmz8dtjSR-InB/s320/isaiah.jpg" width="296" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I haven’t written for a while…been swamped getting ready for some life changing events that were coming my way. One was that last week I was lying on a hospital bed prepping for shoulder surgery. My wife was in the room with me, and there was a full medical staff preparing to take me into the operating room. And yet, in those moments before surgery, I was struck with the awareness that it was me alone in the situation. I was the one who would be cut on, I was the one who would be going into the surgery room, I was the one whose body was going to experience the changes and impacts of the knife.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Afterwards, returning home with my arm limp and numb, again my wife was at my side to assist and aid, except when she wasn’t. She has other responsibilities. And so it was, in the middle of the day, when I thought about having a tuna sandwich that I realized how dependent I now was on the help of others. It occurred to me that while I would like a tuna sandwich, I did not have the ability to work the can opener with just one arm functioning. In fact, there have been a lot of things I have not been able to do on my own, from washing my hair to putting on a shirt to almost everything around the house! At least, not without learning a different way to do the things. For instance, I did have the tuna sandwich, when I recalled that Nola had recently purchased some tuna in pouches and I COULD open those. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It all reminds me of some of the things I experienced during a divorce. There was that sense of being alone, ultimately, in a house without my first wife. There was the realization that things were going to be different. I could continue to do things, but not in the same way. Tasks that once were shared were suddenly entirely dependent on my own ability to do them. What had once been familiar routine was suddenly altered and had to be done in other ways…down to the fact that even the kitchen utensils had been divided and so sometimes I would reach for something that was no longer in my possession. I had to learn a different way.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In my case, these changes of how I am doing things is temporary, in a month or two I expect to using that other arm once again. Many adjustments in a divorce are permanent, but some are also temporary. In my case, the intense aloneness of an empty house has been replaced with the companionship, love and attention of my new wife, something I have especially appreciated during this beginning phase of recuperation! Regardless, though, life is always filled with changing circumstances that challenge us to learn how to adapt and shift to meet the situations we face.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The other thing that has come to my mind has been the whole issue of feeling all alone, and how significant it is that God speaks time and again in the scriptures to this need in our lives. God’s promise is that he will never leave us nor forsake, and as Jesus was preparing to leave earth in the ascension, his words were that he would be with us always, even to the end of the age. One of my favorite passages is from Isaiah 43, where God promises to be with us when we pass through fire or flood. As I entered that surgical procedure, and sensed the aloneness that comes in such situations, the promise of God to never leave us alone was reinforced in a fresh way. Nobody else was allowed to accompany me into the operating room, but no door could keep God from walking with me into that experience. Even while I was unconscious of what was happening, God was present and aware of each knife cut, each suture, each drop of medication. Knowing that my church’s prayer chain had my procedure on their list, and that other friends at a distance were petitioning God on my behalf, meant that I knew in those moments I was never truly alone.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Neither are you. Even if you feel that your life has been disrupted in a radical way, even if your house sounds still and empty, even if you sense nothing around you but darkness and fear, God is always present, nearer than your next breath, just waiting for you to reach out and ask him to guide and protect you through the changing life you are experiencing. I believe that, just as God designed the body so that the wounds made by the doctor will heal, God also has a healing process for our inner beings, and that his remedies for the maladies of our lives are always good. Whatever you are facing today, whatever hard adjustments you are having to make, whatever risks you are taking as you step out into something new, know that God is always willing to walk with you through it all. You have but to call out to him and ask. And while you are asking, please feel free to include my own recuperation in your prayers (and probably patience for my wife in handling her semi-invalid husband!).</span> </span><span style="font-family: Comic Sans MS; font-size: 12pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
</div>
Finding God Devotionalshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07550940803936603735noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2484180023846574054.post-5019507187829303342019-04-19T11:07:00.003-05:002019-04-19T11:07:28.460-05:00The Power of Good Friday<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">RESURRECTION!</span><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></i></b></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEji2Zdhd00v7MHXcqTiEUM-L9GOAZoy1tSdPz0L8sByGWlslOwRiMsqreqdxSVgEk_TkWIOIwAMjNetns3TI0Ue7GnZTLrdPPxZJP3K7ywxOi8CEKfIrnC91f_OJnU40CrDz6dlOSjacK2K/s1600/good-friday-2017-768x769.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="769" data-original-width="768" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEji2Zdhd00v7MHXcqTiEUM-L9GOAZoy1tSdPz0L8sByGWlslOwRiMsqreqdxSVgEk_TkWIOIwAMjNetns3TI0Ue7GnZTLrdPPxZJP3K7ywxOi8CEKfIrnC91f_OJnU40CrDz6dlOSjacK2K/s400/good-friday-2017-768x769.jpg" width="398" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Well, I know that I have been very sporadic in blogs lately, and offer some degree of apology for that. However, our flood relief efforts have been extremely time consuming and valuable. Many people who have been really struggling have experienced hope because someone gave them a pair of rubber boots from our supply to wear when they were cleaning out the mud, or because we helped purchase some needed items as flood victims try to put their lives back together. But it has been a very scurrying and taxing effort on our part. As I said to some of my parishioners one day, it isn’t like we can sit back and have some committee meetings to work out all the details of a perfect plan, because people are hungry NOW, people have nowhere to live NOW, people are trying to get the mud out of their homes NOW. So we have met as we could, planned as we could, and then just worked hard to do the best we could, and I would say I am proud of what the difference we have been able to make, made possible only through the hard work of our people and the generosity of others who have given funds and goods for us to be able to distribute.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I just can’t let Holy Week pass, though, without at least a word to my readers. I believe in the power, the promise and the hope of resurrection…not only into the eternal sphere after death, but even here. When life knocks us for a loop, when our plans shatter, when our hope is dashed and we feel like we can’t go on, when problems arise that appear insurmountable and life takes a sudden downward turn, THAT is the time to remember the promise of the resurrection.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">When God is part of our lives and planning, defeat and despair never have the final word. God turned an ugly instrument of torture and execution into a symbol elevated on church steeples and adorned to be worn around our necks because it became the instrument by which God won our forgiveness and salvation, that same God can bring new life and promise out of whatever circumstances have left you broken, confused and despairing. I cannot tell you how many times I have visited with Christians who have experienced divorce and then years later are able to describe all the ways God used that changepoint in life to open new doors and opportunities, to create new and better relationships, or even to help those individuals turn to God in a deeper way than they had ever experienced before. And that is just one of the shattering events life can bring, but which God can use anyway.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Resurrection speaks of the promise of tomorrow. Resurrection speaks of a God who is bigger than whatever problem you face. Resurrection speaks of a hope that mourning may be turned into dancing and joy will come in the morning.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I know it’s Good Friday, the day we remember the ugliness and awfulness of the painful death of Christ upon the cross. It was OUR sins that he was dying for…it should have been us there, not him! But even though this is the day we remember the crucifixion, I want to urge you to realize something in the midst of it: if there had not been a death on the cross, there would have been no opportunity for a resurrection on Easter morning. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Whatever hard and awful thing you struggle with in your life, no matter how hard and awful it is, it brings with it an opportunity for God to provide a resurrection of your own as he does something good, something fresh, something powerful on the other side of the struggle BECAUSE you went through the struggle, and you went through it with him at your side.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Remember the Lord’s suffering today, remember the promise of resurrection, and rejoice in the hope that is yours for resurrection beyond the troubles of today! Happy Easter!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
</div>
Finding God Devotionalshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07550940803936603735noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2484180023846574054.post-81805399373862525442019-04-07T20:31:00.000-05:002019-04-07T20:31:11.463-05:00Source of Strength<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">THE FLOOD HIT!</span></i></b><b style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i><o:p></o:p></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></i></b></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9-cvu26MQZOintEHObjCLMvxA8ctY1AZmNBcr7CfxX6drdvTU_B2jD96P5uWITY9khAMU7hD-9DthnjzsktXiyClSNuusRcrPmTl1UvzCKOGvleVAFzZWPYpwa5Xfa0OOWgf9LUjkV7l_/s1600/FRE_2036.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1070" data-original-width="1600" height="214" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9-cvu26MQZOintEHObjCLMvxA8ctY1AZmNBcr7CfxX6drdvTU_B2jD96P5uWITY9khAMU7hD-9DthnjzsktXiyClSNuusRcrPmTl1UvzCKOGvleVAFzZWPYpwa5Xfa0OOWgf9LUjkV7l_/s320/FRE_2036.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-align: left;">Sometimes in life, we have things come our way that just sweep everything away.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-align: left;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-align: left;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-align: left;">Here in my part of the country, we have had a lot of flooding come rather suddenly, causing various degrees of devastation in various areas up and down the river.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-align: left;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-align: left;">Some homes have been deluged, others washed away, still others have had mud and water in their basements or garages, and some have had no problems at all.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-align: left;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-align: left;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-align: left;">There was little time for many to prepare, to decide what to take when they abandoned their homes, sometimes little warning of what was to come, and yet each person had to make their decisions in a hurry and then face their own particular devastation.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-align: left;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-align: left;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-align: left;">Some people are desperately struggling with the difficult circumstances that have come their way.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-align: left;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-align: left;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-align: left;">Others are franctically working to help others.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-align: left;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-align: left;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-align: left;">This, obviously, has impacted the regularity of my blogs.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Have you ever had your life interrupted by events that come flooding in and suddenly change everything, flooding events that are entirely outside your control. We can easily experience reversals in life. Divorce, job loss, sudden death, threatening disease…so many things in life are so uncertain. How do you prepare for the unexpected? How do you decide “what to pack up and take with you,” so to speak? How do you regain your equilibrium?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We simply cannot predict the unpredictable, right? We may know that there is something wrong, but we may not realize how wrong until that moment when it all falls apart. I have observed a lot of people handling their situations in the midst of this flooding, and noticed that there are some things that help. One of the biggest things I have heard time and again is people recognizing that what is really important in their lives has not been swept away by a flood: those they love are safe, they still have their health, they still have their faith. I have especially noticed a profound attitude among people of faith. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Even though things seem to have spun out of control, they have a sense that things have NOT spun out of God’s control. They confess a belief that God will do something good out of the tragedy, just as he did through the cross of Christ. They trust that God will help them, will guide them, will get them through this tough time. And, interestingly enough, they are thankful. They are thankful for the things that did NOT happen to them, thankful for what they DO have, thankful for those who are seeking to help. These people, it seems to me, have faced their flooding circumstances by remembering what the one stable and unchangeable force in their lives is: God. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Many times in the Psalms, God is referred to as “a rock and refuge.” Watching the floodwaters here in Nebraska, with the sandy soil all around, one gets a real sense of the value of a firm, rocky foundation over the undependability of shifting sands. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Our world is constantly changing. Our lives are much more tenuous and fragile than we often care to admit. But the constancy of God’s goodness, of God’s love, of God’s willingness to take us back, to help us through, to give us hope and purpose can withstand any threatening floods that might come our way. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The thing is, though, that just as individuals around this region often did not have much time to make choices about their valuables or how to respond, and so acted out of the habit and nature they have developed over the years, so in whatever floods and changes come our way, we don’t always have time to figure everything out in a moment of crisis. Instead, we have to lean on the habits and strength we have developed in the more calm and settled periods of our lives. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">When your crises comes, what are the sources of strength, what are the stabilizing habits you have developed? The governor of our state issued a proclamation setting aside time today as a day of prayer for those affected by the flood disaster. But I think it is much wiser to not wait until that crisis and disaster come to turn to God for guidance and strength. In the times of stability of life is the best opportunity to develop your relationship with God and establish the habits of strength and time in prayer that will stand you in good stead when you find your world is unexpectedly turned upside down.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
</div>
Finding God Devotionalshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07550940803936603735noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2484180023846574054.post-62810743291397970802019-03-10T19:20:00.000-05:002019-03-10T19:20:31.876-05:00A Community of Faith<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">A TIME TO WEEP…</span></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">BUT WHAT ABOUT A PLACE?</span><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></i></b></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiCDjD04dGQrfZnXrc7fMhe49JclyOscWvcJsOb4HnY9PMowA7cMwkyyCduVc5_hWQ8gldB78ZGx8J4MzsoJSgasb0GeN_7JHscPDHIimtUDVVxKf1uhHN8SxO_tDx-wG3mEhgBQZuUqQka/s1600/rejoice-mourn.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="618" data-original-width="618" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiCDjD04dGQrfZnXrc7fMhe49JclyOscWvcJsOb4HnY9PMowA7cMwkyyCduVc5_hWQ8gldB78ZGx8J4MzsoJSgasb0GeN_7JHscPDHIimtUDVVxKf1uhHN8SxO_tDx-wG3mEhgBQZuUqQka/s320/rejoice-mourn.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I was reading the other day, and ran across some comments that got me to thinking. I especially was reminded of this verse from Romans:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><span style="background-color: white;">“Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep.”-Romans 12:15</span></b><b><o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">First, notice that there are three different groups of people described here. There are people who have something special going on in life and are rejoicing because of it. There are people who are going through some kind of painful experience, and are weeping because of it. And there are those Paul is addressing, who are the individuals present with the other two groups. The basic notion, of course, is that we need to be compassionate people and able to share in the life experiences of others in a meaningful way, regardless of what that other individual’s experiences have been.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">What particularly got me to thinking was the “weep with those who weep” idea, because the article I was reading was discussing the healing effect of sharing one’s pain and tears with another. That, of course, is in stark contrast to how more often than not, people avoid sharing their sorrows and trials because they “don’t want to be a burden to others.” </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And yet, if an individual doesn’t share their weeping with you, then how are you going to be able to weep with them? </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And if it is indeed true, that sharing one’s pain helps bring healing, then what purpose is there in try to “keep one’s chin up” and carry on as if nothing has happened? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I have known a number of people who have been divorced, who chose to keep their struggles to themselves, not admitting their financial and emotional stress. The same is sometimes true of people who have obtained a dismal medical diagnosis, or who have lost a job, or is having trouble with rebellious children. We may think we are being noble by trying to carry the burden ourselves, but somehow, in the great design of things, I am not so sure that is what is intended. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">From the very beginning of scripture God makes clear that it isn’t good to be alone, and not only is the creation of marriage a response, but throughout scripture people are part of a community of faith, not out there on their own.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Is there a painful experience in your life? Are there tears that you seek to hold back or deny? Are you neglecting the opportunities for support and healing that are around you if you will but open yourself up to the possibility? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">On the flip side, are there people you know who are in the midst of crisis, trauma or grief? Maybe they are nearby and you don’t even know what they are experiencing. Are you the kind of person who creates an atmosphere in which a struggling person could feel free to share their pain? Or are you a person whose words and actions suppress that opportunity and push them away?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">If we could somehow be more effective in breaking down these invisible walls, I think we would find that our churches and our friendships would take on a deeper meaning. Instead of entering a sanctuary filled with what appear to be happy, together and positive people who have no problems in their lives, we will discover that the church is made up of people just like us: people who struggle, question, make mistakes and yes, sometimes need to just shed some tears. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Whichever side of the equation you happen to be on, how about seeking fresh ways to bring healing into your world?</span><span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
</div>
Finding God Devotionalshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07550940803936603735noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2484180023846574054.post-5211097716539030552019-03-05T20:19:00.000-06:002019-03-05T20:19:18.852-06:00Scooping Ashes<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">ASH WEDNESDAY</span></i></b><b style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i><o:p></o:p></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></i></b></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYbZZSwOx8fWzNYoVCHXA27WNFUi8gxXc6BIcbHLRhr4Wz_YwGvRI6ZH8Tn9C7sRicX1pnW99l8aeYEYECW2zFOe-OYFLMAsVSzVOArRCS4T_2Ne7mAe5pDRuukal6JCuktVovN6ha95Fs/s1600/Ash-Wednesday-Quote.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="628" data-original-width="1105" height="181" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYbZZSwOx8fWzNYoVCHXA27WNFUi8gxXc6BIcbHLRhr4Wz_YwGvRI6ZH8Tn9C7sRicX1pnW99l8aeYEYECW2zFOe-OYFLMAsVSzVOArRCS4T_2Ne7mAe5pDRuukal6JCuktVovN6ha95Fs/s320/Ash-Wednesday-Quote.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">As my wife walked out the door, she wish me a Happy Mardi Gras (or something like that), which reminded me that it was “Fat Tuesday,” which means that Ash Wednesday is next. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In my churches, Lent was not something we generally spent a lot of time with, and occasionally I might have some things in relation to the season, but the primary focus in my churches has always been on Holy Week itself. However, as I thought about it being the time for Ash Wednesday, I thought it worthy of a blog.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I do know that the ashes used for Ash Wednesday are from the burning of the palm leaves from the previous year’s Palm Sunday. Multiple times in the Bible, ashes are used in the ceremonies of grief, placed on the head (probably more of them than the usual spot found on the foreheads of Ash Wednesday observers) as a symbol of grief and anguish. Ashes always derive from something that was once something else, but through the extreme experience of fire, that something is reduced to the remnants we call ashes.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I think in life, we experience a lot of fiery moments, moments that test our mettle, moments that push us to the extreme, moments that can push us to the limit, make us grow discouraged, sometimes even to the point of despair. And sometimes, in the aftermath, things that we once held dear have been reduced to ashes. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Divorce is one of those kind of experiences, when afterwards the vows from the wedding day and all the plans for a future life together are consumed with the process of the separation and end up as ashes, tatters at our feet. But it is certainly not the only such experience. Lots of losses, lots of disappointments, lots of disastrous experiences can create the same thing. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">When some piece of life as you know it has been reduced to ashes, what can you do?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I was reading an article by Terry Helwig in an old Guideposts this morning, and thought it had some pretty good insights I would like to use to launch this blog with today. The comment was that Terry had learned that the Chinese character for the word “crisis” contains within it the symbol for “opportunity.” I don’t know whether that is true or not, but the illustration provided is kind of cool. The writer mentions an article some years ago about an airport forced to close because of snow, with all the usual reactions from those stuck there. Except that one lady decided to use it as an opportunity to teach “kindergarten,” and gathered the children around and led a fun little class, much to the delight of both parents and children. I like this transformational notion. The ashes of cancelled trips was reformed into that opportunity that became something new and special.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In Laura Story’s book <u>When God Doesn’t Fix It</u>, there is a similar notion. In referring to shattered hopes, she says:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> “<b><i>In that moment, we think life as we know it is over.<o:p></o:p></i></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<b><i><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> The truth is, life, as we’ve yet to know it, has just begun.”<o:p></o:p></span></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Can you relate to that? I remember a good friend sharing with me that after her divorce had all settled, she began rediscovering things that she had once enjoyed, and was able to embrace them into a new future. I know that many of the things I have experienced and had opportunity to do became options post-divorce. I have seen the same thing happen in churches, when a church I am working in faces a crisis moment, and some dreams are dashed, but then new ones are born that were not possibilities in the previous environment.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">So, as we come to Ash Wednesday this year, consider the portions of your life that have turned to ashes, sent you into mourning and dashed your hopes. And while it may not be exactly what those who observe Ash Wednesday might intend, let me invite you to do something with the day.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Let illustrate the idea this way: over the course of my life, I have had many times I lived in homes with fireplaces or pellet stoves. Many a time the task that has fallen to me has been to get out the little shovel and scoop up the ashes, carry them out side and cast them away. Are there ashes in your life left over from some shattering experience, maybe divorce, maybe something else? How about using this Ash Wednesday to get out your spiritual and emotional shovel, scoop up some of those ashes and let them go, so that you have a clean and fresh start for the opportunities that are just around the corner? You might be surprised how nice it feels to have cleaned out those dusty, dirty corners of your life, so that something new can live there instead. I even suggest you find some tangible way to symbolize what is going on internally for you—burn a photo, throw away an old letter, give away something that represents the things you need to let go of to make room for the next phase. And you can do this even if, like me, you won’t be putting ashes on your forehead this Ash Wednesday. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
</div>
Finding God Devotionalshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07550940803936603735noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2484180023846574054.post-940499150817553042019-02-24T14:11:00.001-06:002019-02-24T17:07:48.433-06:00The Power of a Snowstorm<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-large;">SNOWSTORM STANDSTILL…</span></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-large;">IS IT A SIGN?</span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjqbahnD3i77AeoPHFRcL3d7Krn85Qc3pYeVHy5K27-r68RiXoys87sshvycTY3MjHisORZwyzEDTdiWMI_uzxkFMXs1dmo599gACM8cxN5IO3AtyhFPc9EEnbHDmah4nG5loFz2SQIoOYS/s1600/IMG_2366.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjqbahnD3i77AeoPHFRcL3d7Krn85Qc3pYeVHy5K27-r68RiXoys87sshvycTY3MjHisORZwyzEDTdiWMI_uzxkFMXs1dmo599gACM8cxN5IO3AtyhFPc9EEnbHDmah4nG5loFz2SQIoOYS/s320/IMG_2366.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; text-align: left;">A few days ago I was visiting with my sister and she described the huge shutdown on the coast in Washington state because of the snowstorm.</span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; text-align: left;"> </span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; text-align: left;"> </span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; text-align: left;">I am not always very sympathetic when the coasts complain about snowstorms.</span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; text-align: left;"> </span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; text-align: left;"> </span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; text-align: left;">It seems to me that when I watch the news media, there are often blizzards and deep snows throughout the plains and mountain states, but whenever it lands on the coasts, suddenly it is an emergency situation worthy of national news!</span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; text-align: left;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I remember with a chuckle the time when Barack Obama was president and after arriving in D.C., they had a snow accumulation of an inch or so and shut everything down. Then President Obama laughed and said that he was just flabbergasted that everything was shut down over such a small amount of snow, because back in Chicago it would have been considered a mere dusting and people would have been out playing in it (as close as I can recall his words). And, as my sister pointed out, I need to remember that they have steep hills there that make a difference, and since they don’t get heavy snow very often, they don’t have the equipment to handle it. I think the latter point is the significant one, because, last time I checked, Colorado gets lots of snow and has some pretty steep “hills,” but manages to handle snow crises in ways that help them keep going. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Another fun example was when, a few years ago, my wife and I drove down to Dallas late one winter for a family event, and the whole city was paralyzed because they had a snow of an inch or two. Driving into the city, as I observed people on the road, I quickly got off the four lane highway as it was obvious the people had no idea how to drive appropriately in the snow and were risking multiple accidents. On the side streets, I ended up making much better time and avoided inexperienced drivers, even though those streets had not been cleared at all.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">We are seeing snow all over the place this week. I read an article from Flagstaff, Arizona describing their record snowfall, and have seen other reports of the snow down there, reminding me of the time we drove our exchange student to the Grand Canyon only to find that there was a record breaking snow storm then, too. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">As I write this, it is on the Sunday after our community received approximately another 8” of snow on top of the previous 5 or 6 inches still on the ground. Crews have been out working through the night and morning. (And, I might add, having driving into Omaha the day after the last big snowfall, these crews up here do a good job of taking these storms in stride!) At the same time, I know some major highways nearby have had significant closures because of the storm, the drifts and accidents, so even here these things can have impact.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Today, many churches cancelled their services, yesterday when I stopped at a local bank branch they had a sign up announcing an early closure due to the blizzard conditions. When I went dog walking this morning, I had to first shovel a path so we could get to the street since the snow everywhere else was too deep to walk in, and then off we went.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Flooding, blizzards, drought, earthquakes and other natural disasters can shut down human activity in a matter of minutes, can’t they? </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I have been in many an ice storm that left many homes without power in just a matter of minutes. In fact, I have always been struck by the highways and roads that we put down which, despite the latest technology, often end up with potholes due to freezing and thawing, and upheaval of segments due to the same thing and heat exposure. The best of our technology is really not as powerful as we think it is. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">These things remind me of the questions God asked of Job in Job 38-41, such as this passage from Job 38:22 (ESV)—<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;">“Have you entered the storehouses of the snow,</span><br /><span style="background-color: white;"> </span><span style="background-color: white;">or have you seen the storehouses of the hail,”</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Those questions asked of Job were designed to remind him that God is God, and Job was not. Neither are we. Snowstorms such as this one can remind us of how fragile the constructions of our lives are. Despite what we like to tell ourselves, we are not as in control as we think we are, nor are we quite as powerful as we might like to think. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I like how this same concept is pointed out in Natalie Grant’s song, “The King of the World.” Here are a few of the lyrics from this song written by Natalie Grant, <span style="background-color: white;">Sam Mizell, and Becca Mizell:<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #282f35;">When did I forget that You've always been the King of the world?</span><span style="color: #282f35;"><br /><span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;">I try to take life back right out of the hands of the King of the world</span><br /><span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;">How could I make You so small?</span><br /><span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;">When You're the one who holds it all</span><br /><span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;">When did I forget that You've always been the King of the world?</span><br /><br /><span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;">Just a whisper of Your voice can tame the seas</span><br /><span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;">So who am I to try to take the lead?</span></span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Whether it is a snow storm, a drought, a divorce, a devastating illness or whichever of life’s challenges you face that just seem too overwhelming and leave you feeling powerless, I urge you to let those circumstances remind you that God is the King of the World and we are not. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Let those huge events remind you to not make God small in your own life, to remember who it is who can tame the seas and who it is that can simply ride on the waves in a tiny boat. And then, let it cause you to reflect on who you really lean on to get you through those tough times, your own limited knowledge and ability, or the God who is and always has been, the King of the World. As I pointed out to my congregation recently, that phrase, King of the World, is a phrase common in Jewish prayers. Sometimes it is translated that way, but there is another translation that I like, which reminds me of who God really is: Master of the Universe. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I haven’t seen the heavenly storehouses of snow any more than Job has, only the little bit that has happened to land near me. Scientists today describe how these snowflakes are created, the various processes and temperatures involved. I recently ran across of the photographic work of Don Komarechka of Canada, which depicts the amazing construction of snowflakes…much more beautiful, delicate, intricate and varied than you might think. </span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://skycrystals.ca/snowflake-gallery/" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;" target="_blank"><img alt=" Don Komarechka Snowflake Gallery" border="0" data-original-height="1024" data-original-width="1024" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjgfa_uPIOZMuLL7GPv23Y_Ne7b9rW1g5IZ2R9myr7Utekl-IvW8ef4s0hrVAERXGbIuRzKmBVtuMFRpWuVV7zOJtafUMBs5XMNqIOLIhCTPrjNQkHe2hLuIwIFubhRdJxqkFutOj_LonhQ/s320/mar4-snowflake5.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><a href="https://skycrystals.ca/snowflake-gallery/" target="_blank">Don Komarechka Gallery</a></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Just looking at the amazingly beautiful detail of this white stuff so many of us curse, and thinking of the artistry God uses to create this troublesome fluff, which only lasts but for a brief time before melting away, causes me to realize how amazingly great God is, and how much he cares about even the smallest of details of my life and yours.</span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">If only I can remember not to try to limit God to whatever box my little mind can concoct, when he is so much bigger, more powerful, more amazing and more caring than I can even begin to imagine.</span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">If there is snow outside your house right now, I encourage you to take a minute to look out at the beauty, at the artistry, at the amazing power of something as simple as frozen water, and then realize it is a demonstration of the God who can get YOU through anything life .brings, and will do so in amazing ways if you just let him be not only the king of the world, but the king of YOUR world, too!</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
</div>
Finding God Devotionalshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07550940803936603735noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2484180023846574054.post-26722387134180933542019-02-17T18:02:00.000-06:002019-02-17T18:02:10.234-06:00Life After Divorce<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">I’M BAAACCCKKKKK!!!</span></i></b></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjJgxugq-OGh3pHNAoEYBTN1Di9e3kULVfH6yLsh02JiWwsTUXIcr5WiOJqklPoWbI5OIkSnxD1a0mXhdbeFvZk_RNym7_0FvDbbrLCuPJFWIvGARNtTFH13XpTIoQUkjKUagvzO3ij3xlH/s1600/Natalie+%257B7+days%257D+January+2019+%252828%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjJgxugq-OGh3pHNAoEYBTN1Di9e3kULVfH6yLsh02JiWwsTUXIcr5WiOJqklPoWbI5OIkSnxD1a0mXhdbeFvZk_RNym7_0FvDbbrLCuPJFWIvGARNtTFH13XpTIoQUkjKUagvzO3ij3xlH/s320/Natalie+%257B7+days%257D+January+2019+%252828%2529.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Hello out there! It’s been a while since I have posted a piece. Sorry about that, I had hoped to get something out for you before Valentine’s Day, since that can be such a difficult time after a divorce. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">If you are one who really struggled this year, you have my sympathy, BUT, you also have now passed a significant milestone in forward progress. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But I have been legitimately busy since I last posted. Today is the one month marker from the birth of a new grandchild! We got to see the baby shortly after her birth, and then again a few weeks later. At the same time, we were working diligently on a number of hectic activities at our church, including a special marriage building dinner for couples in celebration of Valentine’s Day. Out of that hectic context then, I am going to give you today’s thoughts.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I have shared in my books about the time a friend told me, as I struggled through my own divorce, that a divorcee she knew had told her that there is, “life after divorce.” That truth was very hard to see at the time, but as we spent time with our new little granddaughter, the reality of it was right in front of my eyes. (Well, right in my arms, actually!) And then once again as we were part of our special Valentine’s ministry at church, the truth was reinforced once again.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In our case, when Nola and I got married, we each brought children from our previous marriage into the relationship. Those of you who have had that experience know all the ups and downs, uncertainties and joys that come with such a merger. However, such a “merger” means that, for me, there are now more opportunities for grandchildren! And that new grandbaby reminds me that, difficult though divorce is, both for the one divorcing and for the children caught up in their parents’ divorce, on the other side of divorce, life goes on. There will continue to be family gatherings. Babies will be born. The various ups and downs, twists and turns that life naturally brings…marriages, funerals, job changes and moves…all will continue to be part of the natural cycle of life. Sure, a divorce leaves behind complicating factors such as working out holiday schedules in light of time children spend with your ex, or parent child relationships that can be strained due to a wide variety of factors, or even simply the impact of the financial drain that divorce brings with it. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But life goes on…there IS indeed life after divorce. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It can be easy for all the negative experiences and complications to drag you down, to absorb your attention and cause you to lose track of the <i><b>good</b> </i>things that happen in life. But then a new baby is born (or whatever your event happens to be), and you are reminded that there are good things in life as well, good things that would never have come your way had there not been a divorce.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">For me, that includes the reminder of Valentine’s Day. Our little dinner church celebration also included live piano music in the background. As our pianist cancelled at the last minute, a friend and I filled in. The music selections were the usual sappy romantic music. As I practiced and played the songs, I found myself remembering a time when those kind of songs brought tears of sadness, because of the broken relationship of my first marriage. But with this event, I found included were memories and tears of joy. A song from “The Phantom” reminded me of the time my new wife (of 15 years now), procured tickets for us to go see a live performance at an unusual theater for a delightful weekend away. Other songs reminded me that the dream of what being in love could be like is more than just a dream, it is something that can actually be experienced when you meet someone truly special who is truly committed to you.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Once again, it turns out there is, indeed, life after divorce. A fresh start. A new relationship can be different. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">LIFE GOES ON!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Sure, the pain and scars of divorce carry forward and, to some degree, shape how we experience life afterwards. But there are plenty of other pains and scars that everyone carries with them from their past into their future. And there are things we learn, things we appreciate, that only have the impact they do because of the experiences that were so difficult at the time, such as divorce. A life after divorce that can be filled with lots of opportunities that would not have existed otherwise. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">For me, that reminder comes in the form of a little, tiny baby girl who is one month old today. Your reminder may come some other way, but however you get there, especially during those dark and difficult days of life, never forget that life goes on, and as it does, there will be some wonderful experiences ahead!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
</div>
Finding God Devotionalshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07550940803936603735noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2484180023846574054.post-44447049006456666472019-01-06T20:29:00.000-06:002019-01-06T20:29:05.527-06:00Steve and Rachel<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">ON A PERSONAL NOTE…</span></i></b></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0dtQxHGIE2wT6bGqC-5lDd7lOpJRlx9GU3cvn28jPN-3IgEMMYXLzB4nhrRir_ZMarhS_Pa5X0sO9mBfsZ-AYWnfucoahsMyYZSHAqEUnXbQLQJRFrN3NJs1c16pL_mZS3seJ4iAEXeed/s1600/steverachel.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1445" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0dtQxHGIE2wT6bGqC-5lDd7lOpJRlx9GU3cvn28jPN-3IgEMMYXLzB4nhrRir_ZMarhS_Pa5X0sO9mBfsZ-AYWnfucoahsMyYZSHAqEUnXbQLQJRFrN3NJs1c16pL_mZS3seJ4iAEXeed/s320/steverachel.jpg" width="289" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I would like to take this blog to share some thoughts related to some personal experiences from the past few months. A few months ago, one of my dear, dear friends succumbed to the insidious attacks of cancer that had been battling her body for several years. Her husband, also a dear, dear friend, on Christmas Eve received word that a cancer which had been operated on earlier this year, and </span>metastasized<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> and spread to multiple places in his body, and the prognosis was not good. He went on to glory just three days later. I led both of their memorial services, his just yesterday. I also led the service when their eldest son was killed in a car accident just a few short years ago. And my heart breaks for the two remaining sons and their young families, having lost so many so loved one in such rapid succession. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Death is a hard thing even in the best of circumstances, but when it comes in such overwhelming doses, the weight can be very heavy.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I shared with some of them before I left how truly great friends their parents have been in my life. I told them that, in life, we only meet such people occasionally, and that when you find such friends, treasure them and never let them go. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Such people are friends for life. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The funny thing was, one of the daughters-in-law said that the couple said the same thing about my wife and I. I want to share some words of tribute about these dear folks with you, and what it is that so impressed me by these incredible, every day sort of people.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Steve and Rachel faced many hard things in life. They lost children through miscarriage, and one little girl who died at birth. He heard God’s called to ministry and left a good job to study at seminary, taking with him his wife Rachel and their three young boys. While there, she unexpectedly required serious brain surgery, and when she tells the story, it is filled with wonder at God’s protection and provision. She always wanted to share her story, and before she went to heaven, she recorded a piece and posted it. They moved from place to place after seminary as he pastored several churches over 30 years, and at each place they brought a touch of joy, laughter, beauty and deep caring, evidencing the work of the Holy Spirit through their leadership.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">These friends of mine were great servants of God. They invested themselves, invested their funds, invested their lives in showing the love of Christ for decades with anyone and everyone they met. They modeled for their churches what it means to follow Jesus in daily life, the importance of sharing God’s option for forgiveness and salvation through Christ to anyone and everyone willing to listen. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Steve’s compassion showed every time he met with families in grief or struggling in other ways, usually in the form of tears on his own face. His commitment to Christ was lived with no looking back…trusting God, as they both did, with every day of his life and with his future, both here and in eternity. He reminded people time and again that the only way to be truly happy in life, is when you are doing with your life what God calls you to do, obedient to his call and commands.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I loved Steve particularly because of his wonderfully obnoxious sense of humor. Never a stuffed shirt, Steve loved to laugh, loved to make others laugh, and could find humor in even the hardest of circumstance. If anyone lived out the verse that says “The joy of the Lord is your strength,” it was Steve. His love for youth and ongoing involvement with children and teenagers kept his heart young for all 68 years of his life.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">All the heartaches that they experienced in life were unable to knock them out of their trust in God, no matter how hard Satan tried to shut them down. In the midst of some of the roughest experiences this life can bring, their comment always was that God knows what is best, God knows what he is doing, and God can be trusted even if we don’t understand what he is up to. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<span style="line-height: 16.959999084472656px;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">I will always appreciate the way these two wonderfully godly individuals touched my life, shared in my joys and sorrows, provided encouragement and example and challenges that have kept me on track and going day to day. They will be missed, not only by me, but also by many others with whom they have shared in ministry for many years. It is a wonderful thing to know that these friends are not lost to me forever. Their clear commitment to Christ means that one day, I will get to spend time with them again, in the very presence of God forever. </span> </span></span><br />
<span style="line-height: 16.959999084472656px;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="line-height: 16.959999084472656px;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Thank you, my dear, dear friend</span></span></div>
Finding God Devotionalshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07550940803936603735noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2484180023846574054.post-12893548143003571412018-12-30T14:57:00.000-06:002018-12-30T14:57:04.779-06:00Make a Choice this New Year<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">NEW, BY CHOICE?</span></i></b></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8AWFdeh16PFMUgeR7Q6qJueGlMfr9ZDYBHJu-GTCh9K51gE9QkLbOjwJuamZ5jtfABaewDqgHff5Xv0PCe9I_KUqlzG8jCGGNbLFwA-hyziUhRjoBUOzV4Nka-Z9G4z1JaF9xFUV746iz/s1600/Happy-New-Year-760x400.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="400" data-original-width="760" height="210" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8AWFdeh16PFMUgeR7Q6qJueGlMfr9ZDYBHJu-GTCh9K51gE9QkLbOjwJuamZ5jtfABaewDqgHff5Xv0PCe9I_KUqlzG8jCGGNbLFwA-hyziUhRjoBUOzV4Nka-Z9G4z1JaF9xFUV746iz/s400/Happy-New-Year-760x400.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Many people like to celebrate the arrival of New Year’s Day with resolutions for the coming year, seeing the holiday as a time for a fresh start, a second chance, or simply a motivator to start something new. That can be a great thing, or it can be setting oneself up for another year of frustration at unfulfilled hopes and plans. Either way, the idea of looking forward to possibilities and move ahead to something fresh with optimism is a positive asset to have. But those are changes that we choose. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">What about the changes we do NOT choose, but are thrust upon us?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">People going through divorce find themselves in this situation, certainly. Even if they are the ones who filed for divorce, that was not what their preference would have been when they stood before an altar making vows “till death do us part,” but instead found that life had gone in a different direction, and they now find themselves making a choice they wished they never had to make. Other people in divorce find that they face a new year all alone, having been abandoned or rejected by the person they had expected to be with them for the rest of their lives. In either case, this new year will be a significant change in their lives.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Others approach a new year with other kinds of change brought upon them by life. Some may have lost their jobs, and face a search for something different, or may have had to adjust their lifestyle due to having accepted a lower paying position. Some will start this new year in a different community, as their job, natural disaster or family situation forced a move. Some will face a new year of unfamiliar and scary medical procedures, having recently discovered a condition that requires treatment. Some may find themselves faced with the need to care for aging parents who need their help, and so their time and plans have to be adjusted accordingly. Some will experience difficulties with their children that create awkward situations, such as a child who has gotten entangled with drugs and the law, or a child whose financial irresponsibility requires ongoing bailouts or perhaps even a move back home. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Many of these things can come about through choices we select, but many come because of the choices of others, the economic climate, or simply one of the many of the realities of life. It is fun to face the new year with plans and dreams that we have created. It is another thing when we are forced into places we did not wish to go. Or is it?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">To cope on a daily basis, we maintain a sense of control about our lives that is, in many ways, an illusion. For example, I have known many people who are “health conscious” in their diets and workouts, who still end up facing unexpected illness. I have known others who worked hard in life and were frugal in planning for their future, only to have it taken away when their pension disappeared due to the actions of others, or who lost their homes when the market went crazy into a downturn and their mortgage became unaffordable. Even the fact that we have clean water or electricity in our homes is, apart from paying the bills, beyond our control.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We get excited about choices and plans when WE make them…imagining the possibilities and placing our hope in a better day. But we generally don’t feel the same when the choices are forced upon us. And yet, WHY NOT? Just because the changes aren’t ones that we create ourselves, does that mean the change doesn’t bring with it the possibility of something fresh, something good? While the change may not be everything we hoped for, are any of us really so omniscient that we actually know what is best in every situation, or what all the possibilities are in any given scenario? What if, instead of only being optimistic about changes WE choose, we instead make the choice to be optimistic no matter why changes come into our lives? Sort of like the old silly adage of “when life gives you lemons, make lemonade.” Maybe the adage isn’t so silly after all. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">As you face the coming year, with hopes and plans you have created, as well as some that you would never have expected or chosen, I invite you to face them all with optimism and hope. There is always something to learn, always opportunity for something meaningful in even the hardest of circumstances. That was proven by people like Victor Fankl and Corrie ten Boom and Dietrich Bonhoeffer, who found meaning and power even in the hell of German concentration camps. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We can’t always choose the things that come into our life. But we can always choose our attitude as we face them. And for those of us who know Christ, we can face those changes unwanted by us with the knowledge that God is working a plan, even if it isn’t the one we expected, and God’s promise is that his plans are always for our ultimate good. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Perhaps a good New Year’s resolution might be to live each day reminding yourself of that beloved verse Romans 8:28---<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<b><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">“And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to <i>His</i> purpose.” (NASB)<o:p></o:p></span></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Choose to have a </span><b><i>Happy New Year, </i></b>knowing that God is in charge, and he DOES know what he is doing, even when we don’t!.</span><span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: small;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
</div>
Finding God Devotionalshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07550940803936603735noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2484180023846574054.post-14441792251790054862018-12-20T20:46:00.000-06:002018-12-20T20:46:27.589-06:00Choosing Joy at Christmas<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">REJOICING IN EVERYTHING?</span><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></i></b></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEix0UyK5UoMONhSWB7PuLIa9q1NPTFAbC9o5BJ-kZGZoJW73vtx-6a-veTSfFYelKBFUji38REw_bBaoPtS8HyXG3xkDm_6TNsFzVpEEfnS4BkGEnVQa9iFeGa5F6cnGfE-wIAOQsK2baz5/s1600/pid_59814-American-Made-Choose-Joy-Everyday-Inspirational-Plaque--520.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="600" data-original-width="600" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEix0UyK5UoMONhSWB7PuLIa9q1NPTFAbC9o5BJ-kZGZoJW73vtx-6a-veTSfFYelKBFUji38REw_bBaoPtS8HyXG3xkDm_6TNsFzVpEEfnS4BkGEnVQa9iFeGa5F6cnGfE-wIAOQsK2baz5/s320/pid_59814-American-Made-Choose-Joy-Everyday-Inspirational-Plaque--520.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Christmas season is one that is filled with calls to rejoice, and to sing carols like, “Joy to the World!”</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">As you saw in the last blog, though, for some individuals, it may feel anything BUT joyful!</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">From the beginning joy is central to the Nativity, perhaps expressed best in the angel’s call of Luke 2:10--</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><i><sup><span style="background-color: white;"> “ </span></sup></i></b><i><span style="background-color: white;">But the angel said to them, “Do not be afraid; for behold, I bring you good news of great joy which will be for all the people; for today in the city of David there has been born for you a Savior, who is Christ the Lord.” Luke 2:10-11 (NASB)</span></i><i><o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">That is a wonderful sounding ideal, but is it realistic for those who, perhaps through no choice of their own, are finding themselves facing a “Blue Christmas” this year? Or could it be that joy is to be found and expressed, even in the bluest times of our lives? When Jesus grew up, he made a point to tell us that the very words he spoke to us, and the prayers he answers are designed to give us not just joy, but joy made full! How is that relevant when everything in life seems to conspire to take all the joy out of living?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Paul picked up on the same concept of joy, issuing to us a charge to live in joy always. Here are a couple of references that say this: <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<i><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">“<span style="background-color: white;">Rejoice always;<b><sup> </sup></b>pray without ceasing;<b><sup> </sup></b>in everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” –1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 (NASB)<o:p></o:p></span></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<i><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">“Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice!” --Philippians 4:4 (NASB)<o:p></o:p></span></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Notice that he doesn’t describe joy as something we passively receive in life. Rather, he indicates that we have a choice in the matter, that we choose to rejoice, to express joy, to live in joy, to focus on joy, to share joy, and he says it is something we are to do ALWAYS! Obviously, he doesn’t have a clue about how hard life can be sometimes, and how much these things can get you down, right? Wrong. When Paul wrote the Philippians verse, he was sitting in a Roman prison under arrest, soon to be facing execution. He expresses in his writings that he had suffered beatings, rejection, imprisonments and shipwrecks, poverty and almost anything else life can throw at us, and yet he continues to admonish us to rejoice!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Let’s go back to where we started. Christmas from the very beginning was designed as a cause for great joy. Why? Because the Son of God has come to earth to dwell with us and to teach us the ways of God and to give his life as our Savior so that we could be set free from sin and its penalty. No matter what comes into our lives, no matter what reversals we experience, the facts of the coming of Christ and the purchase of salvation never change. That is the cause of joy, that is the source of joy, that is the constant in life for which we are called to always rejoice. Jesus addressed this same issue after sending his disciples out to do ministry on his behalf, and when they bring their report of all the great things that happened as they went, Jesus words to them were:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i><span style="background-color: white;">“Nevertheless do not rejoice in this, that the spirits are subject to you, but rejoice that your names are recorded in heaven.” --Luke 10:20 (NASB)</span></i><i><o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You see, Jesus is describing the key to joy in life, the joy that remains no matter how much life changes, no matter how many difficult and discouraging experiences come our way. The disciples came back joyful and excited about all the things they had seen God do, including their experience of authority of evil spirits just as Jesus had been doing. But Jesus challenged them to adjust their focus, to not rejoice on the things here on earth that are so subject to change and variation, but to rejoice that their names are on the rolls of heaven. If you are letting the blues get you down too much, perhaps you, too, are focusing on the wrong things as your source of joy.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">When we give our lives to Christ, accept him as our Savior and the forgiveness he offers through his sacrifice on the cross for our sin, that is the day our names are written on those heavenly records in permanent ink! Our health may change, our relationships may change, our circumstances may change, all of which can affect our emotional state, turning our happiness into sorrow or worry. But our joy is not based on any of the changing things of earth. Our joy is based on the fact that our names are written in heaven. When things are hard, remember that promise. When everything seems to work against you, remember that you have One who is for you in all eternity. When you despair of life here, remember that it is but a breath of time compared to the real and beautiful life that awaits there. Our emotions can affect our attitudes and our outlook and our energy…but they have nothing to do with the joy that we can count on as we rejoice that our names are written by our Savior on his palm forever. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">No matter what you face, happy times and sad times, times of prosperity and times of need, times of comfort and times of adversity, don’t let those things distract you from your real source of joy. Remember the angel’s call to the shepherds, which is also God’s call to you and to me today:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><i><sup><span style="background-color: white;">“ </span></sup></i></b><i><span style="background-color: white;">But the angel said to them, “Do not be afraid; for behold, I bring you good news of great joy which will be for all the people; for today in the city of David there has been born for you a Savior, who is Christ the Lord.” Luke 2:10-11 (NASB)</span></i><i><o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And then, go about your daily life and rejoice!</span><span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: small;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
Finding God Devotionalshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07550940803936603735noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2484180023846574054.post-35833705961169748432018-12-06T20:25:00.001-06:002018-12-06T20:25:51.159-06:00Is it Really a Time to Celebrate?<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">BLUE CHRISTMAS</span><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></i></b></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVMyOZLRwhPd_sjVIh2J72_X_aDHYIMPMnZ2N-PRhveKWPYPAjEicFrrxyR9a4eu-_owu3sD_8BIbRpDfjoxcIkrEpHPMUFJh8NhAKwIc4O3xG7M7lTiLl4Lyo4UDoBM7rZLA0DVysYtFZ/s1600/bluexmas2k2640.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="480" data-original-width="640" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVMyOZLRwhPd_sjVIh2J72_X_aDHYIMPMnZ2N-PRhveKWPYPAjEicFrrxyR9a4eu-_owu3sD_8BIbRpDfjoxcIkrEpHPMUFJh8NhAKwIc4O3xG7M7lTiLl4Lyo4UDoBM7rZLA0DVysYtFZ/s320/bluexmas2k2640.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">This year, at my church, we will be hosting a “Blue Christmas Vespers Service,” designed for individuals who, instead of looking forward to Christmas with joy, are doing so with a deep sense of dread and sadness. For some of my readers, this will be the first Christmas post-divorce. That means money may be very tight. It may mean that they will be with their children only a portion of Christmas, as the children are shared between parents. For some it will mean spending what is supposed to be such a joyful holiday all alone, shedding tears of loneliness. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Others are dreading Christmas for other reasons. Perhaps a spouse or loved one passed away in the last year, and so this is the first Christmas without that person. Others will have lost their job, or, for those folks out in California, some will have lost their homes and their possessions. Some will be dreading the holiday simply for the reason that family members are not going to be able to come home, and so it will be a holiday all alone. Others are just struggling financially, and wrestle with the fact that they don’t have the wherewithal to purchase the gifts they would like this year. And there are those who are the ones who have been displaced, serving in the military overseas, or far away for educational or work reasons, who are going to spend the holiday away from family and home. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I visited briefly with a gentleman one day, whose spouse has recently entered a care facility for people with Alzheimer’s disease…and just talking about the upcoming Christmas was difficult for him. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> As everyone else is singing “Joy to the World” and “We Wish You a Merry Christmas,” what are these individuals to do? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">As I have been working on the preparations for the service, one of the things that has really struck me is that even the first Christmas was not all jolly and merriment. After all, Mary and Joseph were themselves displaced for the purpose of taxation…and who in their right mind would be joyful about that?!? When they got to the village, they weren’t even able to stay in a proper facility, but had to be out with the animals in a manger (no advance reservations or Presidential suites for them!). And, of course, as we all have been reminded by our mothers and wives at some point or another, even the birthing of the baby Jesus involved the pains of labor. Sure, that anguish tends to be replaced by the joy of having a newborn child, but that doesn’t diminish the pain gone through to get there. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But most of all, I am somewhat haunted by the portion of the story found in Matthew 2:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<i><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Then Herod, when he saw that he had been tricked by the wise men, became furious, and <o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<i><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">he sent and killed all the male children in Bethlehem and in all that region who were two years old or under, according to the time that he had ascertained from the wise men. <o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<i><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> Then was fulfilled what was spoken by the prophet Jeremiah:<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i><sup> </sup></i><i>“A voice was heard in Ramah,<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<i><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /> weeping and loud lamentation,<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt 0.5in;">
<i><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br />Rachel weeping for her children;<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<i><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /> she refused to be comforted, <o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<i><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">because they are no more.” (ESV)<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Our world is filled not just with joy and celebrations, but also with sorrow and pain, suffering and hardship. It always has been. And that is true of the first Christmas as well. The story of Immanuel, “God with us” includes the fact that, from the very beginning, in Christ, God was with us in the midst of our sorrow and sadness, not as an escape artist far removed from it. What anguish there must have been in Bethlehem as day after day, funerals were held for those poor little children so viciously attacked. How the mothers and fathers eyes must have been red with tears and their nights filled with troubled sleep. And yet…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And yet, even in the midst of this awful tragedy, Jesus was present on earth, beginning the life that would one day redeem us and lift us above all the weights of this world. The Spirit of God has been sent forth to those who believe, so that no matter what hardships we suffer and face, we know that we are never alone…Immanuel: God is with us. In the months after my divorce, when the house felt so empty and loneliness was overwhelming, a wise friend reminded me more than once that though I may be very lonely, I was never truly alone.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<span style="line-height: 16.959999084472656px;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">In the story of YOUR Christmas this year, there may also be a mixture of angelic rejoicing and tearful anguish. It is the way of this world. It was there when Christmas began, and it will continue to be in one form or another until the day when God calls it all to an end, and personally wipes every tear from our eyes. Take comfort in knowing that it wasn’t into some storybook fairy tale world that Jesus came, but into the world in which you and I live…the world filled with joy and hurt and kindness and hatred and acceptance and racism…God has entered into the world as it is, and invites us to walk with him through whatever that life may bring, so that we may find meaning and hope no matter what comes. </span></span></span><br />
<span style="line-height: 16.959999084472656px;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br /></span></span></span>
<span style="line-height: 16.959999084472656px;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">As you journey toward Christmas, may you always remember that you never need to journey alone. </span> </span></span><br />
<span style="line-height: 16.959999084472656px;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="line-height: 16.959999084472656px;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Immanuel—God is with you. </span></span></div>
Finding God Devotionalshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07550940803936603735noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2484180023846574054.post-48757871117615112312018-11-25T17:08:00.000-06:002018-11-25T17:08:25.794-06:00Purpose and Plans<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">WHAT’S THE POINT?</span></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></i></b></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi1zwrWOlDtSRl1ZwJaYDs36i1JCPgtjPzQ-vJwTyGcMpoDBXrltgBNet2ktsoJ4kni9ayr4JJzxXDeY9oBSUrcwbtAHXEpwlEOLzlz49YrNn67J3UX-6HNi0UN4Jl1JMnprPjF1649BriY/s1600/51DyEFJXPhL._SX331_BO1%252C204%252C203%252C200_.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="499" data-original-width="333" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi1zwrWOlDtSRl1ZwJaYDs36i1JCPgtjPzQ-vJwTyGcMpoDBXrltgBNet2ktsoJ4kni9ayr4JJzxXDeY9oBSUrcwbtAHXEpwlEOLzlz49YrNn67J3UX-6HNi0UN4Jl1JMnprPjF1649BriY/s400/51DyEFJXPhL._SX331_BO1%252C204%252C203%252C200_.jpg" width="266" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-align: left;">Are you one of those people who wrestles with meaning in life events?</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-align: left;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-align: left;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-align: left;">You know, I mean the kind of person who faces hard things, and then tries to figure out what possible purpose it could serve in your life?</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-align: left;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-align: left;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You think, “Maybe this is to teach me patience or endurance. Maybe I am going to come out a stronger person.” In doing so, sometimes you can drive yourself nuts trying to figure out a purpose, sometimes you can find a meaning that will help you through a rough time, sometimes you come up with an idea of what it’s all about only to find that it doesn’t work out at all, and sometimes you don’t have a clue! </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Regardless, there is something within us that longs for life to have meaning, for our hardship to have purpose, to have a sense that our lives are more than just random experiences that come our way. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The good news is, that instinct within is something hardwired into us by God, because life <i>does </i>have purpose, each life has purpose by design. We really are uniquely designed to fill a specific role God has for us during our days here on earth. As a result, there is an inner longing to discover what our unique contribution is to be, and how the various experiences of life fit into that design.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">When philosophers and theologians get caught up in this discussion, often included are conversations about free will, the role and existence of evil, and whether God <i>allows </i>painful experiences in our lives or designs them to be there for a specific purpose. One of the answers I like best focuses not so much on the origin of those hardships, and instead emphasizes that God is able to take <i>every </i>experience of our lives and use it for good. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">That assurance frees us from trying to figure everything out, so that instead, we can watch and wonder as we see God take the hard things of life and use them in amazing ways. The greatest example, of course, is the awful ugliness of the brutal and unjust crucifixion of Jesus which God used for the ultimate good, the purchase of our redemption and entry into eternal life with God.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Sometimes we may not grasp the good God is accomplishing this side of heaven, because it will only be explained in eternity. For instance, I think of Abraham, who had been promised special blessings from God, but never saw any of them come to fruition while living on earth except the child, Isaac, who was born to Abraham and Sarah late in life. But thousands of years later, God used Abraham’s obedience in a way that brought into existence Messiah Jesus in Bethlehem, resulting in making salvation for any who would come to him in faith—accomplishing something Abraham never would have imagined. What good might God accomplish through your efforts to follow him in obedience?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">One of the hardest experiences of my life was my divorce. It was something I did not want, something I did not believe was God’s desire, and something that was awful to go through. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">To this day I have a hard time understanding how God will use the various results for good. However, I have also become aware that the books I wrote to help people through divorce, could never have been written had I not gone through the experience myself. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">What makes that significant is that as a result, I have had opportunity to help people struggling in divorce by means of the book, the blog, and emails with individuals I have never met, but who have found the help they needed in these simple efforts. I must say those things have given meaning to that difficult period of my life, and are ways God has done something good that I never would have expected at the time.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">What things are hard in your life, right now? What are you confused about, doubting that God could ever use it for anything good? It’s okay if you can’t see it yet. Wait, watch, endure, follow God as best you can, and one day, you will find that God will surprise you with a good you never imagined. It is one of the best promises God has for those who love him! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 15.546667098999023px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<br /></div>
</div>
Finding God Devotionalshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07550940803936603735noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2484180023846574054.post-48248862218926866302018-11-18T20:05:00.002-06:002018-11-18T20:05:57.602-06:00New Year. New Place. New Idea.<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">TRANS-SIBERIAN ORCHESTRA!</span></i></b></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNgtoES0TKySz41VzfZyNF5GHjNC7nvUh-BwJLUs9H0eOkKRWfYc6C98njihL9-sW0zVPZGrxuz6pAZSU0ke1Gy0cf1a85_h5ZfHlEL6ynXSGmzdIWFKdbXp-x9w3bFVHGzqS49K_rAnyw/s1600/TSO2018_800-Event-11f957b4ae.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="800" data-original-width="800" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNgtoES0TKySz41VzfZyNF5GHjNC7nvUh-BwJLUs9H0eOkKRWfYc6C98njihL9-sW0zVPZGrxuz6pAZSU0ke1Gy0cf1a85_h5ZfHlEL6ynXSGmzdIWFKdbXp-x9w3bFVHGzqS49K_rAnyw/s320/TSO2018_800-Event-11f957b4ae.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">If you read my books, you know that one of my suggestions about holidays post-divorce is to create new traditions of your own. However, the same can apply in almost any transition of your life, when it is time to close one chapter and start the next. The importance of embracing fresh traditions to renew or enrich old meanings, or to discover new ones for a new time of life should not be underestimated. After all, when those transitions come, so do the questions.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">For instance, parents who have for years been immersed in their children’s daily needs and activities one day encounter an empty nest when they come home. The questions come pouring in now? Who am I, now that I am not the mother or father of a little child? What does it mean to be a good parent for an adult child. Or after the death of a spouse, the questions become things like, “How am I supposed to go on without her?” or, “How do I fill the emptiness in my home?” New traditions can help us find those answers as we build new meanings for new times.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I think back over my life, and there have memories of traditions, both those that have carried with me wherever I was, and others have varied in different places and different times. For example, from childhood on, I have always spent time watching at least part of the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day parade and the Rose Bowl parade on New Year’s (you can imagine my thrill when I got to attend each of them in person!) Or almost every New Year’s Eve for about 30 years now, a small group of friends have gathered at one another’s homes to play Spades and watch the ball drop in Times Square. (And for those of you math whizzes who are trying to use that to figure out my age, yes, I knew how to play cards when I was 5!!) And no matter where I have been or my situation in life, Christmas Eve always has included a candlelight service at church before any presents were to be opened.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Other traditions have come and gone. For example, there was a time when the Christmas season meant the annual trek to the Cincinnati zoo when it was all lit beautiful lights and the fountain was flooded and turned into a free ice-skating rink, or the walk by Carew Tower downtown with the marvelous exhibit of model trains and festive windows. In Kansas City I loved to drive through a suburban neighborhood where everyone joined together with decorated homes and huge greeting cards in the yards. I communities where I pastored, one we celebrated an annual Christmas party and white elephant gifts with a study group, and another had churches combining to stage a driving tour of live biblical scenes of Christmas and the life of Christ. Or in more recent years, we gathered with my cousins and my dad and uncle, around a long set of tables for a humongous Thanksgiving meal together, or on Christmas Eve for a crazy mad dash game built around white elephant and fun gifts and laughter, which ended after our parents passed away and my wife and I moved. But you see, each of those memories is unique to each of those place, and each of those times, and so becomes a special chapter in my heart.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">So how do you make that new tradition and adapt? After my divorce, for Thanksgiving, I bought one of the deep fryers for whole turkeys, and for several years enjoyed the difference that made in my Thanksgiving feast (as well as among the college students I was leading). I still have the fryer, but don’t use it as often…it was more important at that time. As I struggled to find new traditions to brighten Christmas after the divorce, a friend introduced to an idea that became a great tradition, which was to attend a nearby extravagant dramatic production of Dickens’s <u>A Christmas Carol</u>, which I used as a special time with the children, and with my second wife. I remember that time fondly whenever I hang the “God Bless Us, One and All” ornament on the Christmas tree, even though it has been over a decade since I went. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Another shift for me was that, having used an artificial tree throughout my first marriage, I decided when alone to return to my growing up years, and so for many years in my new home, both when single and with my second wife, Nola, I would make everyone bundle up and we would go to a Christmas tree farm where we could select and cut down our own Christmas tree…but only after searching for a significant period of time to make sure we found the <i>perfect</i>tree. (Well, except maybe that one year when there was also an ice storm and bitter cold, so the youngster with us on the wagon out to the trees “just happened” to find that perfect tree very quickly and were able to spot it without even having to get off the their seats to go and look!)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Memories, meaning, traditions—new and old, each for a time, each for a place, each taking their role in the chapters that compose the story of my life and relationships. Some of those chapters came into being because I moved to a new location. Some came because of life changes such as death or divorce. And some have been there since childhood. This year, I encourage you to look around and consider, what could be that tradition for you?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Oh, perhaps you are wondering about the title of this blog? Well, Nola and I moved to a new church and a new town in Nebraska just a couple of years ago, so we have been having to create new traditions, as she has reconnected and introduced me to relatives on her side of the family. This week, I think I found what I hope will become a new Christmas tradition that will become one of my fond memories from this place and this time. You see, I was recently listening to one of my Trans-Siberian Orchestra Christmas cd’s to help me get in the mood as I was making plans for the church for Advent. In the midst of it, the thought suddenly occurred to me that I love their music and have always wanted to go to a concert, but never knew when they were coming and so always missed it. This time, it was well before Christmas, so I decided to look on the internet to see what their tour was, and lo and behold, they were going to be nearby. I suggested it would make a great Christmas present if my wife wanted to take me, and so she bought the tickets, we went this past week to an absolutely phenomenal concert (if you like their style, of course), and I told her afterwards, I think I have found what might be a new Christmas tradition! I heartily recommend it!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">(By the way, I also told her how refreshing I thought it was to listen to an entire Christmas concert that wasn’t an overtly Christian specialty, and to not once hear anything about Santa Claus or Rudolph or a Grinch or Jingle Bells…just reminders of the wonder of Christmas and the birth of the babe in the manger.) </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">May you each find some fresh and meaningful traditions to embellish this chapter of your life.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> Start now.</span></div>
</div>
Finding God Devotionalshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07550940803936603735noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2484180023846574054.post-51579206545026396692018-11-08T19:22:00.000-06:002018-11-08T19:22:29.891-06:00Elections<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><b> <i>ELECTION DAY: </i></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><b><i>DISASTER OR DELIVERANCE?</i></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><b><i><br /></i></b></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhmNcTcyYLbstnVkyDUnQMCTDdA6TqsccJNhLGrw7vgCz7J8b2Xmkzw91QMVZXpSCjXFx5I3eLTU6pYMUggRfIYGwHrwsh-msiHasLMl0FmQr3_4z224WaUltqeMTqVNEDZz1swZc6zZzfP/s1600/voting-booth-clipart-1.jpg.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="299" data-original-width="244" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhmNcTcyYLbstnVkyDUnQMCTDdA6TqsccJNhLGrw7vgCz7J8b2Xmkzw91QMVZXpSCjXFx5I3eLTU6pYMUggRfIYGwHrwsh-msiHasLMl0FmQr3_4z224WaUltqeMTqVNEDZz1swZc6zZzfP/s1600/voting-booth-clipart-1.jpg.gif" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><b><i><br /></i></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">As I write this blog, voters are standing before machines, screens or with paper and pencil in hand, casting their votes in this year’s mid-term election. If things go the way YOU want them to go, you might be very joyful tomorrow claiming that the nation has experienced some kind of deliverance. If it goes AGAINST your preferences, you might declare the day a disaster! </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Do the elections seem capricious to you? </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Do you get frustrated at political maneuvering and gerrymandering? </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Do you think it has all gone awry somehow? Sometimes, because we live in a country where leaders are voted upon and decided through those votes, we seem to forget that ultimately, God is the one who is in charge. I can’t explain how God uses our election system to accomplish his purposes, but make no mistake: just because we are voting, does NOT mean God has abdicated his place on the throne to bow to our whims. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Do you remember these scriptures:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><i><span style="background-color: white;">Let every person be subject to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and those that exist have been instituted by God.—Romans 13:1 (ESV)</span></i></b><b><i><o:p></o:p></i></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span class="text"><b><i><span style="background-color: white;">For not from the east or from the west</span></i></b></span><b><i><br /><span class="indent-1-breaks"><span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;">and not from the wilderness comes lifting up,</span></span><br /><span class="text"><sup><span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;"> </span></sup><span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;">but it is God who executes judgment,</span></span><br /><span class="indent-1-breaks"><span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;"> </span></span><span class="text"><span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;">putting down one and lifting up another. –Psalm 75:6-7 (ESV)</span></span></i></b><b><i><o:p></o:p></i></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span class="text"><b><i><span style="background-color: white;">First of all, then, I urge that supplications, prayers, intercessions, and thanksgivings be made for all people,</span></i></b></span><b><i><span style="background-color: white;"> <span class="text">for kings and all who are in high positions, that we may lead a peaceful and quiet life, godly and dignified in every way.</span><span class="text"><sup> </sup>This is good, and it is pleasing in the sight of God our Savior” --1 Timothy 2:1-3</span><o:p></o:p></span></i></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">These are just a couple of the scriptures that remind us who is really in charge, that nobody wins elections just through their own maneuvering or popularity, for behind it all there is a God who is acting in ways</span></span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> unseen to accomplish his will.</span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You may want to argue this point, and even choose to use Adolf Hitler as an example to prove God does not appoint the leaders, because of how evil Hitler’s reign was.</span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But I would remind you that when Paul wrote that Romans passage above, as well as this one from 1 Timothy, he was living under Roman domination, a rule so frightening that it was deeply hated in Israel.</span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It was also the Roman Empire that persecuted Christians for daring to not believe that Caesar was divine, culminating in the tortuous murders of Christians under the rule of Nero, who may have been the one in power when Paul wrote Romans.</span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">When Paul was facing his own death sentence, he didn’t write another letter telling everyone he had been wrong, that God doesn’t place these wicked people in power and we shouldn’t respect or accept their authority.</span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Paul truly believed that God is behind the selection of governmental leadership, accomplishing his own purposes whether those leaders bow to God or not.</span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Do YOU believe that?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">When this election cycle ends, I can guarantee you that there are going to be people who won’t like the outcome, whichever way things go. Personally, I think the perpetual grumbling against the government got its biggest boost during the Vietnam and Watergate eras, and that ever since, instead of respecting the office people have sought to bring specific leaders down while freely and viciously criticizing the various officials. Now don’t get me wrong, I can grumble with the best of them! And with the political leadership I have witnessed over the decades since Watergate, there seems to always be plenty to grumble about! <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But if we truly believe that God is behind it all, raising up one leader, removing another, establishing the authorities, then surely that requires us to take a different approach, does it not? Paul spoke against a ruler who was unjustly punishing him once, but when he discovered it was an official leader of the people, he apologized and quoted this verse from Exodus:<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<b><i><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">“You shall not revile God, nor curse a ruler of your people.”--Exodus 22:28 (ESV)<o:p></o:p></span></span></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I wonder how the tone of our country would change if everyone took this stance. If instead of grumbling about the elected leaders and all the government waste or abuse, we took to heart the admonition of 1 Timothy and seriously interceded for these individuals, whether we voted for them, and whether we like them or not. In fact, perhaps one of the causes of poor leadership is that instead of praying for them, we grumble and complain instead. Maybe part of the problem with government leadership isn’t found in the capitol, but is found in our own prayer closets. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Let us all remember that no matter which side of the aisle, and no matter which end of the political spectrum we may be on, together we make up the United States of America, and those opposite us whom some would like to deem to be enemies are, in fact, fellow citizens who also love their country, even if they have a different view of how things should be. It is the ability to learn from one another, to listen to one another, to work our compromises that address the concerns of all that make our government strong. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">So, tonight, if you end up rejoicing, please remember that there are others who are disappointed, just as you may have been in a previous election with a different outcome. And if you end up despairing, remember that no one point of view holds all the answers for our country, we need to learn from one another. Most of all, however you feel after it all, remind yourself that God is still on the throne, and he is moving history just the direction he knows is best….even if you and I are unable to see it ourselves.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Join me tonight, and pray for our leaders, won’t you?</span><span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: 13pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
</div>
Finding God Devotionalshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07550940803936603735noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2484180023846574054.post-7710266801697345972018-10-23T18:34:00.002-05:002018-10-23T18:34:45.614-05:00Don't Believe It, Persevere. Don't Give Up.<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">STILL AT CHURCH?</span><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjU5lZiEYacGSxRP3luFKTVDpZ5VoMIGBp2tD3HFXqzjgpLdGoVhafigoF86XVZhMv8jUakhNWE_Z5SWOE7dZe-xaxYigKqhoNrQSLVzXKK2Dd1gz_ugJpUgLW3oTEHAfMV9BFJWESOsO5J/s1600/church.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="638" data-original-width="822" height="248" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjU5lZiEYacGSxRP3luFKTVDpZ5VoMIGBp2tD3HFXqzjgpLdGoVhafigoF86XVZhMv8jUakhNWE_Z5SWOE7dZe-xaxYigKqhoNrQSLVzXKK2Dd1gz_ugJpUgLW3oTEHAfMV9BFJWESOsO5J/s320/church.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">When a spouse initiates divorce proceedings, the number of things that change are stunning. Housing, banking, holiday planning, scheduling, friendships…it’s like a major seismic shift. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">One of the arenas of life impacted is often church life. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In some cases, I have known individuals who find they are no longer welcome at their church. Others find that worship at church suddenly feels very awkward, especially if both spouses are still attending the same church. And the awkwardness appears in the strangest ways. The place you have always sat together as a couple now suddenly now feels out of place, like you no longer fit there. Worship had always been a shared experience, but now, walking in the door alone, sitting alone, attending small group alone…it can be a very challenging experience. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I once even had an individual who had been divorced for a year or two share with me just how much they hated Christmas Eve services…because of all the services at the church, that one felt the most family oriented to this individual now sitting all alone. All of this is one of the unexpected and unintended consequences of divorce. There are parallel experiences for those who lose a spouse or other family member through death. The empty space beside you can be paralyzing at times. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">What is the solution? Sadly, for far too many divorcing/divorced people, the solution is to stop attending worship altogether. Especially if they are still attending worship in the same sanctuary in which they were married. Memories can be overwhelming. This, too, can be the experience of someone who lost a spouse and then is faced with memories of the funeral and an open casket in the same space. Simply too painful, too overwhelming sometimes, and it can drive a person away.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Sometimes simple shifts can make a huge difference. If attending worship is really bothering you, consider some alternative ideas. If your church has multiple services, try some of the different service times. Most worship attendees tend to sit in the same place week after week. Simply moving to a different location on the other side of the sanctuary can make a big difference. In most churches, if you pay attention, there are almost always individuals who are sitting by themselves. Some of them would be appreciative of the companionship, if you are willing to sit with someone new. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Perhaps your difficulty is when you attend the small group or Sunday School class you have always been part of, and now feel like you no longer fit in. You may feel that way because the class is filled with couples, or it may simply be that the group has too many individuals who knew you as a couple, and it is hard to discern how some of them feel about you now. You may end up considering a different small group, but at the cost of losing the close support network you have enjoyed in that group. On the other hand, it can give you a fresh start, a fresh identity, relationships and support that are all your own.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Some individuals find that none of these ideas are helpful, that any contact at their church just feels too awkward, too depressing. For those individuals, I would encourage you to consider visiting some other churches in your area…you may find a new niche of your own. That search may take time, but don’t give up. In fact, that is the main concept I want to impress upon you: don’t give up. Don’t abandon your church attendance. It is an important priority, and if you start skipping now and then because it feels awkward, now and then becomes often, and eventually it becomes harder to attend, as you fall of the grid. The healthy habit of regular church attendance can quickly become the habit of NOT attending…and that is not a healthy habit to have if you are supposed to be a follower of Christ. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">It may take a while for you to find that new niche. It may even take years. Friends may not understand the trauma you feel whenever you attend worship. It is easy to get discouraged. It is easy to think you will never fit in anywhere again.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">But don’t believe it. Persevere. Don’t give up. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">When those feelings start to overwhelm you, visit with the pastor to share your struggle. Odds are there is someone else in the congregation who has gone through a similar experience, and that person could be a good resource to help you through. With patience, you will one day find that new niche where you once again experience God’s presence in worship. But only if you don’t give up. </span> And if you don’t give up, I promise that one day, you will be glad that you didn’t.</span><span style="font-family: "Comic Sans MS"; font-size: small;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
Finding God Devotionalshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07550940803936603735noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2484180023846574054.post-24057807156676378072018-10-14T20:56:00.001-05:002018-10-14T20:58:42.570-05:00Assumptions about Cohabitation<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<br />
<br /><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Have you heard the old story of individuals who work to put their spouse through medical school, law school or to help them get that chance at a career, only to find that once the goal has been achieved, they are dragged to divorce court while their spouse moves on with their lives with someone else? I know people who have had that happen, don’t you? </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Well, imagine that same scenario, only this time, they did not get married, but only “cohabitated” (as the term goes). The same breakup, the same broken hearts, the same person being taken advantage of and left high and dry. But what is NOT the same, is that there is no legal recourse. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">There is no court to insist that the spouse deserves some financial support to compensate for all the years of sacrifice and commitment that were made. There is no opportunity to make a case as to who should keep the house or the furniture. If one person decides to try to hide away all the money, or unfairly take advantage of the situation, there is no recourse to make address any such wrongs that have been suffered, no judge to make sure that each person is treated equitably, because there is little or no legal standing to help. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Beyond that, when a couple living together split up, it is unlikely that they will receive the kind of compassion, support and encouragement that sometimes comes to those whose marriage fails, because it appears to people to be not much different than a simple dating breakup. But for those who have entangled their lives with another, the emotional baggage can be as devastating as a divorce.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Many people today ASSUME living together before marriage is the best way to go. In fact, many consider it the norm today. They often believe it will give them better success if they do get married, as it gives them a chance to test it out, so to speak. But, as I regularly share during pre-marital counseling sessions with individuals who are living together, the facts are just the opposite: those who live together first actually INCREASE the likelihood of a divorce, and more! </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Let me give you some sources and let you look for yourself. Below I offer three webpages, easily found in any search, that explain what is real and what is not in terms of marriage, living together first, and divorce. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I think it will surprise you. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">You can jump to the pages by clicking on the picture above the statements from the website. I especially want to emphasize these truths to folks who have been divorced already, because very often, since they are already divorced, they can come up with a mindset that it really doesn’t matter, since they have been divorced before, or because of the divorce they are even more hesitant to commit. I especially urge those of you who are in that situation to consider the information below very carefully.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgTsqFt51iT0LbDgPzyTob0IAWUrPKkZKj8412xJ9tvVpVDcvWlnJfTVV4C_B0YRDDx2isMaJUTEz_aCloR-Q6DTZYmiuzJqUYw04zyuFAlndh-5hrLWd3q12rQlFDLcLEkbG3Qin33F2pd/s1600/firsthingsfirst.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="811" height="277" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgTsqFt51iT0LbDgPzyTob0IAWUrPKkZKj8412xJ9tvVpVDcvWlnJfTVV4C_B0YRDDx2isMaJUTEz_aCloR-Q6DTZYmiuzJqUYw04zyuFAlndh-5hrLWd3q12rQlFDLcLEkbG3Qin33F2pd/s400/firsthingsfirst.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://firstthings.org/myths-about-living-together" target="_blank">First Things First</a></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> <b><u><span style="font-size: large;">First Things First:</span></u></b></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">This website lists the following, and explains that these are untrue beliefs:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 15.546667098999023px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="line-height: 16.959999084472656px;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Living together is an easy way to “try out” a relationship before committing to marriage.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 15.546667098999023px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="line-height: 16.959999084472656px;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Living together will give us a stronger marriage.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 15.546667098999023px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="line-height: 16.959999084472656px;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Sharing finances and expenses will make things easier on our relationship.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 15.546667098999023px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="line-height: 16.959999084472656px;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Your sex life goes downhill when you get married.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 15.546667098999023px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="line-height: 16.959999084472656px;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Marriage is just a piece of paper. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 15.546667098999023px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="line-height: 16.959999084472656px;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">It’s only temporary. (60 percent don’t get married…39 break up and 21 just never commit.)<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 15.546667098999023px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="line-height: 16.959999084472656px;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitXuWeqaJvVUYmm5Gh46AOp5vgt37xoCrz_JKjQmfhMzmP9CuqamBh1mLmuwVTaPi6I9HvgRQDpISRJT4bGmPJCLckMqzDcRDH-n-bE5xy5Jgk9gy6A-sdZPm6jahCiNt_sjUKdohYNNtA/s1600/204169-647x450-movingout_crop.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="450" data-original-width="647" height="277" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitXuWeqaJvVUYmm5Gh46AOp5vgt37xoCrz_JKjQmfhMzmP9CuqamBh1mLmuwVTaPi6I9HvgRQDpISRJT4bGmPJCLckMqzDcRDH-n-bE5xy5Jgk9gy6A-sdZPm6jahCiNt_sjUKdohYNNtA/s400/204169-647x450-movingout_crop.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://divorce.lovetoknow.com/Divorce_Statistics_and_Living_Together" target="_blank">Love to Know</a></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 15.546667098999023px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="line-height: 16.959999084472656px;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>Love to Know</b></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 15.546667098999023px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="line-height: 16.959999084472656px;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">“A couple who does not live together prior to marriage has a 20 percent chance of being divorced within five years. If the couple has lived together beforehand, that number jumps to 49 percent. If a couple chooses to live together as an alternative to being married at all, the likelihood that the relationship will break up within five years is 49 percent. At the 10-year mark, a married couple has a 33 percent chance of breaking up. For the unmarried couple who is living together, the likelihood of a breakup is a whopping 62 percent.”<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 15.546667098999023px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 15.546667098999023px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="line-height: 16.959999084472656px;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">The Spruce</span></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<img border="0" data-original-height="639" data-original-width="960" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXDX6xSOf0sL46-I5x3mZg3o8k_Puk0jWUwJ54xv2NR8SHx4j4fMC_uYu5qERJyGZkN6YnY7UX0JkSTqW3mmvqJ98s1wLt3_Oo87tEC_GewOGxEcRMR8kCfdv7wflZ0Kpn8s48btUwa8j6/s400/466080633-56a5fe6e5f9b58b7d0df6328.jpg" width="400" /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://www.thespruce.com/cohabitation-facts-and-statistics-2302236" target="_blank">The Spruce</a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 15.546667098999023px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 15.546667098999023px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="line-height: 16.959999084472656px;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">“Living together is considered to be more stressful than being married.”<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 15.546667098999023px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="line-height: 16.959999084472656px;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">“In the United States and in the UK, couples who live together are at a greater risk for divorce than non-cohabiting couples.” <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 15.546667098999023px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="line-height: 16.959999084472656px;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">“Cohabiting couples had a separation rate five times that of married couples and a reconciliation rate that was one-third that of married couples.”<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">The more you read on the topic, the more you realize that many people today are falling for a lie, and it is ruining their lives. Living together, without the honest commitment of a lifetime, in a relationship that still maintains “mine” and “yours” mentalities, or the option of a supposedly easy exit, does NOT accomplish what most believe it will. In fact, it often undermines the very thing they are hoping for: chances for a stronger marriage. If you are considering this option, I advise you to rethink your plans. And if you know someone else who is considering this option, you may save them a lot of heartache if you tell them the truth that nobody else is saying. God knew what he was doing when he designed marriage as a permanent cleaving together of husband and wife. </span> None of our supposed improvements are really improvements at all!</span><span style="font-family: "comic sans ms"; font-size: 12pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
</div>
Finding God Devotionalshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07550940803936603735noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2484180023846574054.post-49755273803832093972018-10-07T19:55:00.001-05:002018-10-07T19:55:43.951-05:00Is this true?<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">THE DECLINE OF THE DIVORCE RATE?</span><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I ran across an article on Yahoo the other day that indicates the divorce rate in the U.S. has gone down some 18% from 2008 to 2016, and that “the trend has been driven by younger women, despite divorce rates among older women higher than in the past.” It goes on to say that the marriage rate has fallen as well. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><span style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><a href="https://www.yahoo.com/lifestyle/millennials-causing-divorce-rate-drop-heres-164143152.html" target="_blank"><img border="0" data-original-height="1237" data-original-width="1600" height="308" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHR8omrPUqsoHhIYY8AjRlb5p_CYVK4tC1WS8zWPAaxYqPQd2TlvshieGHEU7DirbNBRh7h17k0giQXyrADmU-akLwDqQ2uEvgMBPyCzElHmefIWxZUQ7_0ebY8iTUsiTEZdZK0dNu-CUR/s400/mille.jpg" width="400" /></a></span></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.yahoo.com/lifestyle/millennials-causing-divorce-rate-drop-heres-164143152.html" target="_blank">Click on picture to access full article</a><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-align: left;"> </span></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Maryland professor who apparently did the study, suggests that marriage is becoming more selective and stable. The article then quotes a psychologist who is pleased about the trend, since divorce is so painful and difficult, and speculates that the two people still likely to be getting married are those who deeply hold traditional values and those who have taken a lot more time to choose their mate. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">There are some interesting ideas underlying all of this. For instance, one of the things that is also a trend that living together, which used to be the exception and relatively rare, is now described as “the norm.” It also implies that, all along, those who hold strongly to the traditional values of marriage, and those who have taken time to think through their selection before getting married, have been the ones who were most likely to avoid divorce. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Another unspoken issue is that now, as couples choose to live together rather than marry, when they split up (as they often do), their split is not counted in the divorce rate as it used to be when they got married instead. Somehow, I think if one were to include those breakups, we would find that the rate of split is the same or even higher, since there is already a higher divorce rate among those who live together first than those who do not. (That topic will be addressed in a future blog.)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It also seems to me that the counselor who sees all of this as a good thing, (since divorce is an awful experience), has missed realizing that when a couple living together breaks up, that is ALSO a traumatic event…and perhaps even worse than divorce! </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Among those who work with teenagers, it has long been considered that the breakup of a long-term dating relationship is as traumatic for them as a divorce is for an adult. If that is the case after merely dating, how would it not also be the case after a couple living together split? In fact, I would suspect that it might be even worse in many ways….which I may also address in the future blog.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">So while I agree that a falling divorce race is a good thing, especially if it means that people have developed such a high attitude toward marriage that they take time to think it through thoroughly before committing. But if that falling rate is attributable to the fact that the marriage rate is also declining, with people choosing to be refuse to really commit, and choosing to ignore the emotional and moral issues involved in choosing to opt out of making the choice of a marriage, I am not particularly impressed. In other words, I think there is much more going on than meets the eye, and the pain and brokenness that comes with the dissolution of deep and meaningful relationship remains significant, whether the couple dared to take the risk of committing in marriage or to stop short of that. Broken relationships hurt, and I suspect there are still a lot more of them than this study is suggesting.</span><span style="font-family: Comic Sans MS; font-size: 11pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
</div>
Finding God Devotionalshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07550940803936603735noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2484180023846574054.post-28352004968964262582018-10-01T20:32:00.000-05:002018-10-01T20:32:28.114-05:00It's a Messy World<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">CIVILITY, HOSTILITY AND ENTANGLEMENT: </span></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">BOUNDARY CONTROL</span></i></b></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5vXs7cfcth0vcyjEof__izVbhYtRpbNGre9v-DLvtNtLvxqtrpY-rpW1-3y40mT_Xp59iCv8ly99O7mW5wrXTA-b4w3k3Ih8r1CuBB2_SDf3z7K_31WPOKQ8sYUuk5TGk7iv9RzwAK-7r/s1600/messy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1237" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5vXs7cfcth0vcyjEof__izVbhYtRpbNGre9v-DLvtNtLvxqtrpY-rpW1-3y40mT_Xp59iCv8ly99O7mW5wrXTA-b4w3k3Ih8r1CuBB2_SDf3z7K_31WPOKQ8sYUuk5TGk7iv9RzwAK-7r/s400/messy.jpg" width="308" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">With all the talk and arguments here in the U.S. over the border with Mexico and what should be permitted and what should not, it occurs to me there are other boundaries that exist in divorce where the lines of demarcation are not always so clear, and sometimes that can create real difficulties.</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">In Hollywood, the modus operandi is to show couples post-divorce talking together about the children, covering child care for one another in a pinch, and being happy for the other person when they “find someone.”</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Oh, not always is it depicted this way.</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Often one partner is shown to still be struggling while the other moves on.</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span><span style="font-size: small;">But it is always so clean cut.</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span><span style="font-size: small;">In real life Hollywood, however, we hear quite a different story, for the news is filled with high profile divorces battling it out over mansions, access to children, and whether or not a spouse can survive on a mere $1 million a month!</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span><span style="font-size: small;">It isn’t nearly as pretty as the fictional depictions.</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Although the fictional depictions are just that, certainly they contain some good things to aspire to post-divorce.</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span><span style="font-size: small;">Things like moving on with life, or wishing the best for the other, or becoming friends who can work together for the children.</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span><span style="font-size: small;">All of these are good and noble things, and things to aspire to or work toward, but they aren’t the practice quite so often.</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">More often than not, one partner has moved on in such a way that he or she really does not want to continue to be entangled in the concerns and life of the other partner.</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span><span style="font-size: small;">That distancing may come from a sense of guilt, as the partner who left the marriage may wrestle with a conscience that reminds him/her that the desperate situation the ex is in stems from the divorce, and wouldn’t be that way if only he/she had stayed to work things out.</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span><span style="font-size: small;">Sometimes the distancing can come from trying to get disentangled from an overly-needy spouse from a highly dysfunctional relationship…in an effort to regain some sense of self and sanity.</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span><span style="font-size: small;">Regardless of the reasons, or the situation, once a divorce is finalized, there seem to be endless questions about healthy boundaries (especially if there are children) that simply have to be sorted out.</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">For instance, is it appropriate for an ex to have a key and walk unannounced into their former home to plop down on the couch and ask, “what’s up?”</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">It happens, believe it or not.</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">On the opposite end of the spectrum, there are some who seek to inflict pain on their ex, by finding trivial things for which to call the police in on them, or by making their financial world more difficult than it need be as they refuse to make court ordered payments.</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Sometimes, an individual may seek a divorce and long for independence…until something around the house needs to be dealt with that used to be the job of the ex…balance the checkbook or fixing the garbage disposal for example.</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span><span style="font-size: small;">That individual may call the ex, and ask if they would be willing to come take care of the problem for them.</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Is going to help out a sign of a good friendly relationship that sets a good example for the kids?</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Or is it getting sucked back into the dysfunction?</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Is refusing to help being mean?</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Or is it setting appropriate boundaries?</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Or is it allowing the individual to experience the consequences of the choices made when he/she sought a divorce?</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Actually, it could be all of the above.</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">In some ways, these seem like such stupid questions.<span> </span>But they are questions that can make a lot of difference in whether the parties are able to accept the realities of the divorce, to move on in life and to heal.<span> </span>I have known of individuals who have been willing to help out with problems in the old house because they felt that it was impacting the well being of their children.<span> </span>I have known others who were willing to help out, because they hoped that the call was a sign that their ex was finally realizing that they needed their spouse and the divorce was a mistake.<span> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">It can be so messy!<span> </span>Messy, because there are not hard and fast rules to follow, no clear steps that fit every situation.<span> </span>Each person in each relationship has to sort out what works best for their situation.<span> </span>All too often, however, they make those choices out of hurt, anger, revenge or even fear.<span> </span>It could sound like this:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">“If I don’t help her and it turns into a mess, it serves her right…she wanted the divorce in the first place!”</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">“I know I can’t do this by myself, but there’s no way I’m ever letting HIM step his foot into this house ever again!”</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">“If I help him this time, it will give me a chance to see what’s really going on in that house, and then I will have more evidence to use in my court battle for custody!”</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">“I’m not going over there, I know exactly what’s wrong with that disposal, I had the same problem for years, and it only takes resetting that little button on the bottom.</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span><span style="font-size: small;">But I’m not going to tell HER that!</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span><span style="font-size: small;">Let her suffer!”</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">“If I don’t respond to the request this time, how will he react?</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span><span style="font-size: small;">Will he blow his top and make things worse?</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span><span style="font-size: small;">Will he try to break into my house some night to trash it or worse?</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span><span style="font-size: small;">Having never stood up to him before, do I really dare to do so now that I’m on my own and in such a precarious situation?”</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">The process of establishing new boundaries, a new home, the start of a new direction of life, is a very challenging one in the best of circumstances.</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span><span style="font-size: small;">Depending on the emotional state of yourself and your ex, that process can be a healthy and useful experience, or it can be one filled with confusion, anger, frustration and pain.</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span><span style="font-size: small;">You have to determine based on your own situation what will work for where you are in that process.</span><span style="font-size: small;"> </span><span style="font-size: small;">For those of you struggling with these questions, I would offer a few suggestions.</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small; font-weight: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">1)<span style="font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small; font-weight: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span dir="LTR"></span></span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small; font-weight: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small; text-indent: -0.25in;"><b>Respect</b>.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small; font-weight: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small; font-weight: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">Do your best to maintain a sense of respect for your ex’s right to make their own choices and for the boundaries they establish on their side of the relationship.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small; font-weight: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small; font-weight: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">Without respect, nothing else is going to get very far.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; font-weight: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">2)<span style="font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span><span dir="LTR" style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; text-indent: -0.25in;"></span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small; text-indent: -0.25in;"><b>False impressions.</b></span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; font-weight: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small; font-weight: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">Be very careful that as you set boundaries, or allow those boundaries to be crossed, that you are not sending false signals (ie, the example above of the individual hoping the need means the ex realizes they made a mistake).</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; font-weight: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small; font-weight: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">State clearly your expectations and what your intentions are.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; font-weight: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">3)<span style="font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span><span dir="LTR" style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; text-indent: -0.25in;"></span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small; text-indent: -0.25in;"><b>Avoid entangling behaviors</b>.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; font-weight: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small; font-weight: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">Assess each boundary question with an eye to whether the choice you are making is leading to a dysfunctional enmeshing that is counterproductive to your own stability and health.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; font-weight: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small; font-weight: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">Divorce sets you on a path of your own.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; font-weight: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small; font-weight: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">Bouncing back and forth between that new path and the old only creates confusion and instability.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; font-weight: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small; font-weight: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">If the disposal needs fixed, call the plumber, or develop friendships with others who may be able to provide assistance when you need it.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; font-weight: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">4)<span style="font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span><span dir="LTR" style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; text-indent: -0.25in;"></span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small; text-indent: -0.25in;"><b>Avoid making decisions based on anger, hostility and revenge</b>.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; font-weight: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small; font-weight: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">Feeding anger’s appetite only creates a bigger anger, and starts another cycle of battle.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; font-weight: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small; font-weight: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">Step away and gain control before making decisions that you may regret in days to come.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; font-weight: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">5)<span style="font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span><span dir="LTR" style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; text-indent: -0.25in;"></span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small; text-indent: -0.25in;"><b>Aim for civility.</b></span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; font-weight: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small; font-weight: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">Choose to do your best to take the high ground in any decision.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; font-weight: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small; font-weight: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;">That may or may not mean you go help balance the checkbook, but it may impact how you say, “no” and the alternative suggestions you might make.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; font-weight: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; text-indent: -0.25in;">6)<span style="font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal;"> <b> </b></span></span><b><span dir="LTR" style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; text-indent: -0.25in;"></span></b><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small; text-indent: -0.25in;"><b>Lastly, develop some transparency</b> with a wise friend who has some degree of impartiality, or even better, with a qualified counselor who can help you sort out the best boundaries for your situation.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; font-weight: normal; text-indent: -0.25in;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; caret-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: start; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;">
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">It’s a messy world, creating the next chapter after a divorce.</span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: small;">You may not always get it right, but you can at least be heading in the right direction.</span></div>
<style class="WebKit-mso-list-quirks-style">
<!--
/* Style Definitions */
p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal
{mso-style-unhide:no;
mso-style-qformat:yes;
mso-style-parent:"";
margin-top:0in;
margin-right:0in;
margin-bottom:8.0pt;
margin-left:0in;
line-height:106%;
mso-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:11.0pt;
font-family:"Calibri",sans-serif;
mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:Calibri;
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-bidi-font-family:Arial;
mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;
mso-fareast-language:EN-US;}
p.MsoNoSpacing, li.MsoNoSpacing, div.MsoNoSpacing
{mso-style-priority:1;
mso-style-unhide:no;
mso-style-qformat:yes;
mso-style-parent:"";
margin:0in;
margin-bottom:.0001pt;
mso-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:11.0pt;
font-family:"Calibri",sans-serif;
mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:Calibri;
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-bidi-font-family:Arial;
mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;
mso-fareast-language:EN-US;}
p.MsoListParagraph, li.MsoListParagraph, div.MsoListParagraph
{mso-style-priority:34;
mso-style-unhide:no;
mso-style-qformat:yes;
margin-top:0in;
margin-right:0in;
margin-bottom:10.0pt;
margin-left:.5in;
mso-add-space:auto;
line-height:115%;
mso-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:11.0pt;
font-family:"Calibri",sans-serif;
mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:Calibri;
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-bidi-font-family:Arial;
mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;
mso-fareast-language:EN-US;}
p.MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst, li.MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst, div.MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst
{mso-style-priority:34;
mso-style-unhide:no;
mso-style-qformat:yes;
mso-style-type:export-only;
margin-top:0in;
margin-right:0in;
margin-bottom:0in;
margin-left:.5in;
margin-bottom:.0001pt;
mso-add-space:auto;
line-height:115%;
mso-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:11.0pt;
font-family:"Calibri",sans-serif;
mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:Calibri;
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-bidi-font-family:Arial;
mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;
mso-fareast-language:EN-US;}
p.MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle, li.MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle, div.MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle
{mso-style-priority:34;
mso-style-unhide:no;
mso-style-qformat:yes;
mso-style-type:export-only;
margin-top:0in;
margin-right:0in;
margin-bottom:0in;
margin-left:.5in;
margin-bottom:.0001pt;
mso-add-space:auto;
line-height:115%;
mso-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:11.0pt;
font-family:"Calibri",sans-serif;
mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:Calibri;
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-bidi-font-family:Arial;
mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;
mso-fareast-language:EN-US;}
p.MsoListParagraphCxSpLast, li.MsoListParagraphCxSpLast, div.MsoListParagraphCxSpLast
{mso-style-priority:34;
mso-style-unhide:no;
mso-style-qformat:yes;
mso-style-type:export-only;
margin-top:0in;
margin-right:0in;
margin-bottom:10.0pt;
margin-left:.5in;
mso-add-space:auto;
line-height:115%;
mso-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:11.0pt;
font-family:"Calibri",sans-serif;
mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:Calibri;
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-bidi-font-family:Arial;
mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;
mso-fareast-language:EN-US;}
.MsoChpDefault
{mso-style-type:export-only;
mso-default-props:yes;
font-size:11.0pt;
mso-ansi-font-size:11.0pt;
mso-bidi-font-size:11.0pt;
font-family:"Calibri",sans-serif;
mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:Calibri;
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-bidi-font-family:Arial;
mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;
mso-fareast-language:EN-US;}
.MsoPapDefault
{mso-style-type:export-only;
margin-bottom:8.0pt;
line-height:107%;}
@page WordSection1
{size:8.5in 11.0in;
margin:.75in .75in .75in .75in;
mso-header-margin:.5in;
mso-footer-margin:.5in;
mso-paper-source:0;}
div.WordSection1
{page:WordSection1;}
/* List Definitions */
@list l0
{mso-list-id:63573278;
mso-list-template-ids:1761115204;}
@list l0:level1
{mso-level-number-format:bullet;
mso-level-text:;
mso-level-tab-stop:.5in;
mso-level-number-position:left;
text-indent:-.25in;
mso-ansi-font-size:10.0pt;
font-family:Symbol;}
@list l0:level2
{mso-level-text:"%2\)";
mso-level-tab-stop:none;
mso-level-number-position:left;
text-indent:-.25in;}
@list l0:level3
{mso-level-number-format:bullet;
mso-level-text:;
mso-level-tab-stop:1.5in;
mso-level-number-position:left;
text-indent:-.25in;
mso-ansi-font-size:10.0pt;
font-family:Wingdings;}
@list l0:level4
{mso-level-number-format:bullet;
mso-level-text:;
mso-level-tab-stop:2.0in;
mso-level-number-position:left;
text-indent:-.25in;
mso-ansi-font-size:10.0pt;
font-family:Wingdings;}
@list l0:level5
{mso-level-number-format:bullet;
mso-level-text:;
mso-level-tab-stop:2.5in;
mso-level-number-position:left;
text-indent:-.25in;
mso-ansi-font-size:10.0pt;
font-family:Wingdings;}
@list l0:level6
{mso-level-number-format:bullet;
mso-level-text:;
mso-level-tab-stop:3.0in;
mso-level-number-position:left;
text-indent:-.25in;
mso-ansi-font-size:10.0pt;
font-family:Wingdings;}
@list l0:level7
{mso-level-number-format:bullet;
mso-level-text:;
mso-level-tab-stop:3.5in;
mso-level-number-position:left;
text-indent:-.25in;
mso-ansi-font-size:10.0pt;
font-family:Wingdings;}
@list l0:level8
{mso-level-number-format:bullet;
mso-level-text:;
mso-level-tab-stop:4.0in;
mso-level-number-position:left;
text-indent:-.25in;
mso-ansi-font-size:10.0pt;
font-family:Wingdings;}
@list l0:level9
{mso-level-number-format:bullet;
mso-level-text:;
mso-level-tab-stop:4.5in;
mso-level-number-position:left;
text-indent:-.25in;
mso-ansi-font-size:10.0pt;
font-family:Wingdings;}
@list l0:level1 lfo1
{mso-level-start-at:0;}
@list l0:level3 lfo1
{mso-level-start-at:0;}
@list l0:level4 lfo1
{mso-level-start-at:0;}
@list l0:level5 lfo1
{mso-level-start-at:0;}
@list l0:level6 lfo1
{mso-level-start-at:0;}
@list l0:level7 lfo1
{mso-level-start-at:0;}
@list l0:level8 lfo1
{mso-level-start-at:0;}
@list l0:level9 lfo1
{mso-level-start-at:0;}
-->
</style><br />
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
</div>
Finding God Devotionalshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07550940803936603735noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2484180023846574054.post-4256008357347511842018-09-01T19:16:00.004-05:002018-09-01T19:16:50.078-05:00Challenged by God<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">PLAGUING SCRIPTURES?</span></i></b></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></i></b></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiEFTREgnc-_v8bIjyp9ciTF-DMhAJSb_wEHKIYyYiKLofIR3PFMWf2NUJl3ymb7yELSAkds8afnwF9ad3e7Ke2cKBAewUul5vglrlEwSx9EMD-UCWdV7Ky2wJGb-Fb7CbUmEL-8PxfYMKn/s1600/Sept1blog.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1036" data-original-width="1600" height="258" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiEFTREgnc-_v8bIjyp9ciTF-DMhAJSb_wEHKIYyYiKLofIR3PFMWf2NUJl3ymb7yELSAkds8afnwF9ad3e7Ke2cKBAewUul5vglrlEwSx9EMD-UCWdV7Ky2wJGb-Fb7CbUmEL-8PxfYMKn/s400/Sept1blog.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">One of my observations over the years has been that devotional books tend to focus on a certain number of passages over the years, time and again. Favorite passages or books, like Psalm 23, or the Gospel of John, or the Book of Romans for example. One of those passages is one I call my “plaguing passage.” Maybe, for that to make sense, I should quote it for you first. It’s Matthew 6:25-34. It’s kind of a long passage. It is from the teachings of Jesus:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="color: blue;"><i><sup>25 </sup></i><i>“Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? <sup>26 </sup>Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? <sup>27 </sup>And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? </i></span><i><span style="color: blue;"><sup>28 </sup>And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, <sup>29 </sup>yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. <sup>30 </sup>But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? <sup>31 </sup>Therefore do not be anxious, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ <sup>32 </sup>For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. <sup>33 </sup>But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. <sup>34 </sup>“Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble. (English Standard Version)</span><o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Now, why do I call it my plaguing passage? Well, it is because it is extremely relevant for my life, time and time again, and since it keeps popping up in the devotions I read, it keeps reminding me over and over again, too! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You see, I am pretty good about trusting that God will take care of me, and provides the things I need in life. UNTIL….until I’m in a new situation, one that is different than what I have had before, or one that I is harder than what I had before, or one that stretches me further than I did before, or one where I can’t imagine how it is ever going to work out. In other words, each time I am being challenged to grow beyond my comfort level, I have to be reminded to not worry. I have to be reminded to trust. I have to be reminded that God still cares, that God understands, that the issues I face are not anything God didn’t expect, nor are they so big God can’t handle them, and that just because<b><i>I </i></b>can’t see a solution doesn’t mean that GOD doesn’t have a solution! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It seems like I’m always having to be reminded that God can get me through whatever I face. And that He knows what I need, and will always meet that need. And that I need to focus on today’s troubles, and deal with tomorrow’s troubles tomorrow! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Perhaps “plaguing” isn’t the best word. After all, when God is helping us to trust and to grow, it isn’t really a plague, is it? It’s a blessing, because God is helping us to become more than we are, helping us to learn the path to victory and peace. It’s because it means God isn’t going to give up on me, and that he will patiently keep reminding me of what I need to know, and encouraging me to keep trying, and giving me the hope and strength to hang on and remember that God has my back. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">That passage may be an important challenge for you as well. After all, when life falls apart as it does in divorce, worry and fear and uncertainty can become overwhelming. But maybe there is something else that is challenging in your life. Is there a lesson God has been trying to teach you over the years, an area you just keep running up against and feel like you keep struggling to achieve? Or a passage that God just keeps putting in front of you over and over, to remind you, to challenge you, to help you know that He really does care, and that He really will protect you, and that He really does have a plan for your good whether it feels like it now or not? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">If you identify with that experience, I encourage you to embrace the teaching, accept the challenge, and let that reminder spur you on to greater things in your walk with and work for God. And you can offer a little prayer for me, too, that I will learn on a higher level how to trust God with whatever comes, and to do so without “worrying about tomorrow!”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
</div>
Finding God Devotionalshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07550940803936603735noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2484180023846574054.post-11930691724298186852018-08-26T17:56:00.000-05:002018-08-26T17:56:14.599-05:00New Normal<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<b><i><span style="color: blue; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;">EMPTY SPACES IN LIFE</span></i></b></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSLr-Q_D1fveOGNEL94xuQGd6X8CGUze1uyBiN8EhwqxdKmY-SkdaCkSdnYOSC78S9KJW5TUdsS5rgAa_fj7_QCfJD3ioDZA6YOBayyes3lAKGmKQ2eDtkOCNvoTss5a18eaO3jOEAEzKl/s1600/keep-calm-it-s-the-new-normal-2.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="700" data-original-width="600" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSLr-Q_D1fveOGNEL94xuQGd6X8CGUze1uyBiN8EhwqxdKmY-SkdaCkSdnYOSC78S9KJW5TUdsS5rgAa_fj7_QCfJD3ioDZA6YOBayyes3lAKGmKQ2eDtkOCNvoTss5a18eaO3jOEAEzKl/s320/keep-calm-it-s-the-new-normal-2.png" width="274" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">There is in the book of Matthew 12 this really odd story that Jesus tells about what happens when he casts an evil spirit out of someone. He says that when the evil spirit leaves the person, it wanders aimlessly until it decides to go back to the person where it finds things empty and open, so it moves back in with others and takes over. I think there is an important lesson in it, that has nothing to do with the evil spirit side of it. In some ways, it is kind of like the old saying that “nature abhors a vacuum.” <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">For many people in change points of life, there are these “empty spaces” that are the most painful or most lonely. Weekends are one of those places. If you are post-divorce, or recently widowed, or maybe relocated alone for example, the weekend may come around and you see all these people with their plans for Friday night or a Saturday outing, and you realize that you have no one to go with. It can intensify the feeling of being alone. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The same can be true of special places. Like that favorite restaurant that you have eaten at for years, or the vacation spot you enjoy. When you go through these times of change, those places can start to feel very awkward. Places you once loved now make you feel out of synch. Activities that you once loved just don’t feel the same. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It can even be the case in your living space. You can walk into an empty house and the walls just seem to echo with emptiness. If divorced and the children happen to be at your ex’s, then the silence in the house can be deafening. Or you can walk into the kitchen where the dishes are waiting and be reminded that you are the only one there to deal with them…because you are on your own. For someone who has lived in shared space previously, these things can be hard.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Whether it is about the space, the experience or the activity, sometimes everything just feels out of kilter. What do you do? This is where I think the words of Jesus can be helpful. To leave the “empty spaces” of our lives <b><i>empty, </i></b>will not be a useful place to be…it can just create problems. Instead, we need to learn how to fill the empty spaces of our lives with something meaningful. Let me explain.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">When we come into an empty home, if the home is just as “it used to be” when YOU are not, or when the people in the home are no longer there, then perhaps it is time to make the home “NOT like it used to be.” If that favorite restaurant now feels awkward because of past associations, then perhaps it is time to find a new restaurant you can claim as your own new discovery. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Or when you have those long empty times such as weekends, maybe it is time to make a new activity the focus of that time. Whereas you used to go to a movie on Saturday night, instead choosing to go help at the homeless shelter on Saturday nights instead. It is as if you are reclaiming a piece of yourself as you stake out new uses for the empty spaces of your life, uses that are uniquely your own.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">This kind of principle is found in Ephesians 4 in relation to a changed lifestyle. Paul writes that we are to no longer tell falsehoods, but INSTEAD, we are to speak the truth in love. Those who have been know to steal, INSTEAD need to work hard and develop the habit of giving! No longer speak evil and disparaging words, but only words that impart grace and encouragement to others. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It is the idea of intentionally choose NOT to live with a vacuum, but instead, to operate on the theory of replacement. Or, as a friend of mine who happens to be visiting today said, you create a “new normal” for yourself. So if you have places in your life that just feel like empty spaces, whether due to being an empty nester, newly widowed, recently divorced, relocated or for any number of reasons, I encourage you to consider ways to not leave those spaces empty, but see them as opportunities to express yourself in new ways and allow God to use you in new ministries you never knew you could do! Sure beats having an evil spirit and his buddies come back to attack, huh? 😊<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
</div>
Finding God Devotionalshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07550940803936603735noreply@blogger.com0